Fragments of Love
by ColdErratic
Summary: After Nakiri Erina left Totsuki, Soma was crushed. He remains heartbroken, even as he presides over the Elite Ten going into his second year. Can he recover from his anguish and rage, even as confusing events reopen old wounds? Rated T for mature language and fluff, may change as the story is updated.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello, wonderful people of FanFiction! This is my first ever fic, so it's probably not going to be the best fic you've ever read, but I'm hoping I can improve over time and provide stories of a much higher quality.**

 **Regarding context for this story, the main bulk of the story occurs within the 92nd Generation's second year, whilst flashbacks and the sort take place any time before that. However, the "true" beginning of this story takes place directly after the Central Arc, so that's the definitive start point for this story.**

 **As I said, this is my first fic, so any review is greatly appreciated.**

 **Thanks for choosing to read this story, hope you'll enjoy it.**

* * *

He was dreaming. He knew he was. Every single night, the same damn dream.

He was always aware when his subconscious tortured him with the memories he had tried so hard to forget, when he was forced to relive these excruciating past lives that haunt him whenever he collapses from exhaustion or cries himself into slumber.

He could never control them. Never. Not once had he ever managed to purge his mind of these cruel reminders of reality. He was a prisoner to his own suffering, and he could only spectate as the once best moment of his life turned into the most painful, as he was tormented by another sleepless night and more agonising hours remembering her.

Her glimmering amethyst eyes that captivated him with her every glance…

Her long, luxurious, golden locks that felt so silky whenever he ran his hands through them…

…Her soft lips.

Every single detail of the girl who possessed his every thought was burned permanently into his brain, causing more violent unconscious spasms that disturbed his rest even more.

"What did I do wrong?" He would always question, never getting an answer in reply.

"Was I… not good enough?"

"Clearly." He would always retort, never questioning the fact that he was talking to himself, in his desperation to move on from the immense pain he would always feel when she crossed his mind.

He could recall it, word for word, frame by frame. The frequency of these night terrors had become so great that he could recite the entire scene without the need for his subconscious to do it for him.

Every single time, without fail. This was how it went.

* * *

It was the day after the Regiment de Cuisine had concluded, the rebels winning in an extraordinary feat of heroism and determination. Of course, Soma knew he was at the centre of it all, but he never really wanted to accept the praise he received as a result of his marvellous achievements. Except her. He would gladly accept any kind of praise from her, especially if that praise consisted of words such as "It's" and "Delicious." Preferably in that order.

She was still residing within the Polar Star Dorm, despite her not needing to hide from her tyrannical father anymore, his permanent ban from Totsuki after his defeat to the rebels assuring this. However, she had taken a surprise liking to living with its zany residents and even backed up her point with bemoaning how long it would take to take all her stuff back to her original room. Everyone at the Polar Star could tell how obvious her lie was, but gladly welcomed her to the dorm with open arms, allowing her to stay in the same room as she had done before. Right next to Soma.

He must admit, it was strange for her to suddenly request him to visit her room that night, especially since she could easily just visit him if she so desperately wanted to be alone with him. Soma smirked. Even though it was quite out of the blue, here he was. Positioned in front of Room 301, bracing himself to knock on her door.

He had no idea what to expect. She was always unpredictable. One minute she'd be treating you like a close friend, the next, she'd act like you were her sworn enemy. The latter definitely applied to Soma the most, but he had to concede. In the aftermath of the Regiment de Cuisine, she had acted a lot friendlier to him. But today, today was an entirely different story.

She had barely made eye contact with him all day, always keeping her head firmly down whenever he tried to meet her gaze. And whenever he talked to her, she would stammer and shake as if she

were freezing cold. Even someone as dense as Soma could decipher that something was up, but what exactly it entailed, he had no clue. After flubbing her words all day, she had calmly whispered in his ear as she walked by him, so as not to draw the attention of the others, to meet her in her room at ten o'clock sharp.

He glanced at his watch. 10:01. He sighed, knowing she'd probably get mad at him.

He took a deep breath and steeled himself for whatever happened, and rapped his knuckles three times of the wood.

Silence.

Soma waited for a few seconds. He sighed in frustration as he realised she was probably pranking him and was about to walk away when a small voice broke the silence and spoke to him.

"Come in."

Soma took a final inhale of air and opened the door before he would anger her by making her wait.

There she was. Nakiri Erina. Still clad in school uniform, she was sitting up on her bed, shoujo manga placed on her lap. Her long, golden hair was untied and flowed freely along her back and she had a vacant look on her face, seemingly staring at nothing, even as Soma walked in. The silence was very much awkward indeed, and Soma coughed to gain Erina's attention. She jolted out of her reverie, and, despite inviting him into her room, still looked shocked to see him standing there.

She looked up at Soma and, for the first time that day, made direct eye contact with him. Golden orbs met purple ones and the two found themselves paralysed in each other's gazes, Soma only just realising how cute that shade of lavender looked on her. In his mind, he chuckled. She's too busy pouting and screwing her eyes shut that I never really got a good look at them. Weirdly enough, Soma felt a tightening around his chest as he stared deep into Erina's eyes, and he wondered if he needed to see a doctor.

Time seemed to slow as the two continued to gaze into each other's eyes, with neither of them willing to break the contact. Eventually, Soma's curiosity got the better of him and he broke the silence again by speaking.

"So, er, Nakiri…Why did you want to see me?" He managed to get out.

Erina blushed fiercely and snapped her head away, finally ending their intense staring contest, and began stuttering her words again.

"W-Well, er, y-you see, um, Y-Yukihira-kun…" She began trailing off and ended her sentence without really explaining anything.

"Yeah? What's up, Nakiri? You can tell me, you know." Soma was confused at Erina's flustered state and took a seat opposite the bed to fully hold the conversation.

Erina looked back at Soma, her face tinted red and her lips trembling.

"I, er, just…wanted to say thank you. For everything. For helping me in thwarting my father. For helping me to rediscover my passion for cooking. A-And for…" She trailed off again, and Soma assumed that was all she wanted to say.

"Oh, is that it? Nah, it was nothing. You don't need to thank me for any of that." Soma grinned, sensing a positive change to the atmosphere between him and the girl before him.

"B-But, I don't t-think I would've been able to d-do it without you, Yukihira-kun…" Soma tilted his head at her response, clearly confused at what she was saying.

"Ah, come on! I didn't do that much, did I? Besides, weren't you the one always going on about how I was unworthy of going to this school and that you'd love to see me get expelled?" Soma laughed, unaware of the impact his words were having on the flustered teen.

Soma saw her deepen an even darker red as she grew more embarrassed and he couldn't help laughing some more. For a girl who acts so high and mighty and prides herself on appearance, she blushed very often in his presence and always dropped her regal act when speaking to him. But this was an entirely different Erina. She was a lot timider, and her words sounded gentle, rather than their typical rough sting that she usually projected towards him.

"Is that all you wanted to say to me, then?"

Erina didn't respond.

"Well, if that's it, I'll be on my way now."

Soma got up and began walking for the door, when Erina suddenly shot up from the bed and gripped his wrist firmly.

"Yukihira-kun! Wait!"

Soma was left paralysed from the feeling of Erina's hand closed around his wrist. He admired the warmth that permeated his skin from hers, and found himself rooted in place as Erina restarted their staring contest. This time felt different, but Soma still felt that ache in his chest again, stronger than ever. He could hear his own heartbeat pounding even more rapidly in his ears as Erina shifted closer to him, never breaking the contact between her hand and his wrist and their eyes.

"Soooooo…" Soma began, not really knowing how to continue the conversation past the awkward sentence beginners.

Erina's eyes widened in disbelief as she finally became aware of the bold action she had taken.

"I-I, er, Y-Yukihira-kun, I…" Erina's vocabulary seemed to have been limited to stuttering his name and tripping over whatever it was she was trying to say. She looked down in embarrassment, seemingly afraid to look Soma in the eyes.

Soma tilted his head in confusion and waited for her to continue.

"I-I don't really know how to put it…" She began, sensing his perplexity and mulling over her words carefully.

"You could…just say it, you know?" Soma grinned, clearly enjoying Erina's flustered state.

"I…" Erina gulped down her trepidation and looked up at Soma, seemingly bracing herself for her own words.

"I…like you, Yukihira-kun." She managed to get out through her trembling lips.

"Oh, is that so?" Soma replied, oblivious to the true meaning of her words. "Well, I mean, thanks and all, but you didn't really need to say it, Nakiri, I pretty much gathered that already."

She froze at his words and looked at him incredulously.

"R-Really?" She said, her hand around his wrist visibly shaking now.

"Well, yeah. I mean, you'd have to be pretty cold to say we weren't friends at this point!" Soma chuckled, at first unaware of the glare Erina was directing towards him.

"Of course he doesn't understand," Erina groaned inwardly, cursing herself for forgetting how dense Soma was.

"You idiot! I don't mean like that!" Erina blurted, her emotions overriding her common sense.

"Well, how else do you mean…" Soma began, before the realisation hit him like a truck and he was left dumbfounded at Erina's confession.

Even someone as oblivious as Soma was able to decipher what she really meant, and Soma could feel his face warming up as he searched his empty brain for anything to say.

The initial awkward silence before was nothing compared to this one. Erina, suddenly realising what she said and that Soma had completely understood it, found herself unable to say anything, her throat seemingly closing up from anxiety.

Soma just stared.

Into those beautiful purple eyes.

Those constrictions in his chest became even tighter and Soma felt his heart beat crazily inside his chest. The Nakiri Erina…had fallen for him? He would have scoffed had the girl in question not be directly in front of him. But he felt strangely…happy. Why? Maybe it was because no one had ever confessed to him before, and he was just glad that someone found him attractive. But he knew his ego wasn't that big. No, he knew the reason he was so happy was because it was Nakiri Erina. He had somehow managed to hide the fact that he reciprocated her feelings from even himself. But now that Erina's outburst had cleared his mind, he knew exactly what he wanted.

Soma grinned wickedly. "If that's the case," he thought to himself, "I should have some fun…"

Erina caught onto Soma's devilish smile and felt a chill run down her spine. What was he planning?

Suddenly, without warning, Soma snaked his arm around Erina's waist and pulled her even closer to wards him, so much so that their noses were practically touching.

Erina froze up at the sudden movement and could swear she felt her heart stop beating.

"Y-Yukihira-kun?" Erina whimpered. "What are you-"

Erina didn't have time to finish her question as Soma leant forward and locked his lips with hers. She flinched immediately at his foreign touch, but just as immediately returned the kiss, running her hands through his messy red hair.

Soma pulled her in even tighter as the kiss deepened and his heart rate quickened. He thought eventually his heart would burst out of his chest. But he didn't care about that. Even if that did occur, he would die a happy man.

Neither of them had an idea of how much time had passed since their first kiss, but again, neither of them cared. All that was on their minds was each other, and appreciating each other's embrace. Soma squeezed Erina's waist, eliciting a squeal from the girl, and Soma grinned through the kiss, completely enamoured with how warm she was.

Eventually, Soma pulled away, finding himself almost on the verge of passing out due to the lack of oxygen. Erina was disappointed at first, but gratefully took in lungfuls of air as well. Both panted heavily, still staring deep into each other's eyes, a string of saliva still connecting them, even when their lips weren't smashed together.

"Well," Soma puffed, his grin stretching from ear to ear, "that was something." He laughed warmly as Erina buried her head in his chest, clearly too embarrassed to look at him directly.

He wrapped his arms around her and squeezed her gently and she returned the affection, her breathing now back to normal.

"I've gotta admit, that was quite a shock to the system, you confessing and all!" Soma teased, enjoying how Erina blushed wildly at his comment. She didn't reply, probably because she was too sheepish to. Soma chuckled again. "So how long has…this been a thing?" He queried, taking full advantage of his control of the situation.

"I guess…ever since I moved into the Polar Star dorm…" She replied, her voice slightly muffled through his chest.

"You guess?"

"I mean, I-I didn't think it was anything like this! I just, had that feeling, you know? And I only realised it after we won the Regiment de Cuisine…" She trailed off, mortified at how vulnerable she was whenever this man was around her.

Soma beamed happily. "So does this mean we're…dating?" Soma smirked, trying to provoke her in to growing even more flustered. As expected, it worked.

"I-I, I g-guess…" She whimpered, her face deepening even redder than before.

"Why are you just guessing? I thought you were more assertive than this, Erina." Soma teased, loving every flustered reaction she made.

"A-And who gave you permission to call me by my first name?" Erina exclaimed, her quivering voice betraying her desired confidence.

Soma chuckled but didn't reply, and instead bent down and nuzzled Erina's neck lovingly.

Erina tensed at the sudden feeling. "S-Soma-kun?"

"Oh, you can call me by my first name, but I can't?" Soma ribbed brazenly, and Erina turned back into the shy and timid girl he saw all day, stammering and struggling to respond.

"B-But, I-I, I mean…"

Before she could say anything else, Soma kissed her again and rubbed her head affectionately. Erina immediately silenced herself and looked straight at Soma, a genuine smile painted on her lips.

"Thank you…Soma-kun."

"No problem, Erina."

They shared a laugh and Soma found himself amazed at how crazy the situation had turned. One minute he was bracing himself for another rant about how mediocre of a chef he was, the next he was making out with the Nakiri Erina! He grinned to himself. "Looks like the next few years'll be pretty entertaining," he thought. He looked down at Erina again and smiled.

* * *

Then he woke up.

He growled in anger as he sat up. Why did he have to constantly be reminded of her? It hurt too much remembering her when he was awake, but to be constantly harassed by her presence whenever he was asleep as well? It was unbearable. He knew he missed her. He didn't need to be forced to remember this fact over and over again.

He glanced at the time. 6:32. He groaned and got up, despite his agonising fatigue. He got dressed and stared at himself in the mirror and sighed. His eyes were raw red again, undoubtedly from the tears he had shed during his dreams. He hated waking up this early. When he didn't have Elite Ten duties, he could sleep in if he wanted, but now he didn't even have the luxury of choice. It was especially difficult being the First Seat. Soma chuckled dryly. Ever since he came to the school, he was dead set on getting the top seat at Totsuki, but now he was here…he couldn't deny it. He hated it. Too much work. Too many sour memories. "Another damn thing she did to me." He found himself instinctively grinding his teeth in anger as he yet again reminded himself of her.

He stopped and regained his composure. All the second years knew why Soma always balled up his fists or clenched his teeth whenever the former Princess of Totsuki was mentioned. They take care not to talk about her as much as they can, but it was unavoidable, given her previous presence within the school. Their relationship had been no secret. The two were basically the perfect couple, and everyone knew it. They always were an odd pair, but anyone could tell how great they were for each other. That's why when they suddenly split, they could see how deeply it wounded him.

Soma felt no need to bottle up his emotions, but his pride always got the better of him, and he made an effort to put on a brave face and pretend that everything was alright. Soma always felt irritated when faced with his emotional trauma, it'd been three months already! Why couldn't he just get over her?

Pushing all thoughts of her out of his mind (temporarily, of course), Soma walked out of his room and proceeded towards the Elite Ten Council room. However, he always had to endure the same torment even as he left, as he once again passed Erina's room, the room where all of his pain originated.

Soma felt another tear fall down his cheek.

He didn't look at the door as he walked by.

* * *

 **And that's the first chapter! Hope you enjoyed!**

 **As I said, this is my first fic, so I need all the constructive criticism I can get. Feel free to review with any recommendations or critiques you may have.**

 **Thanks for reading this story, talk to you guys later!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Well, here's another chapter for you all! Thanks to everyone who read the first chapter and feel free to suggest any ideas or criticisms you may have with the story. Any review is greatly appreciated.**

 **On with the story…**

* * *

"Yukihira!"

Soma snapped out of his daydream almost immediately. They had become quite common over the past few months, where he would zone out of whatever conversations or activity he had been involved in and get lost in his own destructive thoughts. Of course, the main focus of his reverie was _her_ and he always mentally cursed himself for obsessing over her yet again.

No matter what words he used to talk himself out of thinking about her, his subconscious wouldn't obey and he often found himself in situations he had no idea he was a part of. Such as right now.

Soma looked around the Elite Ten Council table, the nine other members staring at him dubiously as he regained his senses. This was how the meetings usually went. Soma, as the First Seat, would bring up the topic of discussion and left the other members to converse about it, while he would unconsciously revert back to his agonising thoughts of the girl who preceded his current position.

"Right, right. Sorry," Soma muttered, his attention focused on the Fifth Seat, Takumi Aldini, apologising as he usually had to, since Takumi was usually the one who had to pull him out of his daydreaming state.

"Jeez, Yukihira, you seriously need to pay attention to these things. The First Seat's the most important after all," Takumi responded, visibly and audibly fed up with his newly acquired job in tethering Soma to reality. He had no idea how the responsibilities had fallen to him and he always questioned why the Second Seat or Fourth Seat weren't the ones to put Soma in his place. They did outrank him after all.

"He's right, Yukihira, you've gotta stop dicking around and actually focus on your duties," Hayama Akira coincidently added, furthering intensifying Takumi's annoyance that the Second Seat _really_ act like he was Soma's right hand man.

"You're the one who ended up on top, Yukihira. You defeated me and Hayama, so you're the one who's gotta take your finger out and actually work!" Kurokiba Ryo growled, clearly still sore of that fact that being the Fourth Seat, he was the loser out of the trio whose rivalry was revered throughout Totsuki.

Takumi always found himself grinning at Ryo's outbursts, as it reminded him of himself when he and Soma first stoked the flames of their rivalry. Well, it _was_ really just him that started it, but Soma had proven to be a worthy adversary. Nowadays, Takumi found himself acting more as a good friend for Soma than an intense rival. He supposed he had Hayama and Ryo to thank for that. Two chefs who matched Soma's intensity and his cooking ability, it was inevitable that he'd be the one pushed to the side. Takumi had graciously accepted defeat, but still held out hope in besting the red-haired First Seat one day.

"Oh, Ryo-kun! Don't snap at Yukihira-kun like that!" Nakiri Alice pouted towards her aide and, more recently, boyfriend. The Third Seat always defended Soma whenever they contested his daydreams, clearly more considerate of Soma's position, being someone who Erina meant a lot to, like Soma. Takumi always wondered how the white-haired vixen fared with Erina's disappearance, never being able to beat her cousin and always being second place to her without a chance for retaliation. Maybe she saw Soma as a kindred spirit, and therefore took his side when it came to Erina, even if meant opposing her own boyfriend. Ryo didn't really seem to mind, however, and merely shrugged and sat back in his chair.

"B-But, you know, Soma-kun…" Takokoro Megumi timidly began. She was always the shy girl the rest of them knew as a first year, but gaining Sixth Seat seemed to really boost her confidence. Even more surprisingly, she had started paying less attention to Soma and _a lot_ more attention to Takumi. He always found himself grinning when he recalled that memory, of the two excitedly celebrating their victory over Central together, the struggle they experienced as rebels furthering tightening their bonds. Eventually, sparks flew between the two and at around the same time Soma and Erina announced their relationship, they had already begun their own.

Takumi winced inwardly. He knew he couldn't mention Nakiri as long as he and Soma were around the others, but still felt guilty when the former First Seat happened to cross his mind.

"T-This has been going on f-for a few months now. I think we're all just concerned t-that there's been no change…" Megumi always had the habit of stuttering and tripping over her words whenever she was trying to debate with the others. Takumi didn't mind, however. _Just another thing about her that makes her even cuter,_ he found himself thinking more often that his pride would let him say.

Soma dipped his head and didn't respond.

"Guys, we really should just drop it and focus on the topic at hand." Arato Hisako argued, her argument replicating Alice's stance in defending Soma, yet again due to her close relationship with Erina. The Eighth Seat was aware of how much Soma meant to her friend and mistress, which was her reasoning for backing him up whenever it was evident that Soma was still hurting. Takumi was curious at how much the pink-haired secretary actually knew in regards to the entire Erina situation, but he knew better than to interrogate her about it. His curiosity would have to go unsatisfied, it seemed.

Hayama gazed at the Eighth Seat, clearly fairly annoyed that his girlfriend had taken Soma's side, yet again. He never held it against her, especially after they had started dating, but he had to admit, it wasn't a good feeling, being undermined by your girlfriend of all people. Hayama stayed silent, having already said his piece in the argument.

"We always drop it, Hisako! Every time for the past few months, we've always dropped Soma's behaviour, but we can't ignore it anymore! It's becoming a huge detriment for the Council," Mito Ikumi exclaimed, her erratic demeanour quite characteristic for her, but Takumi knew better than to chalk it down to mere emotion. He knew the Ninth Seat's passionate outburst was entirely out of concern for Soma's well-being. He had to agree with her, though. Despite Erina's disappearance occurring around four months ago, it was concerning how Soma was still hung up on it. It didn't seem to be improving, either. In fact, considering the conversations he had with Soma, he was convinced he had gotten _worse._

"Give Soma a break, it can't be easy having so many responsibilities to deal with. Of course he'd get distracted often," Ibusaki Shun replied calmly, his hair covering his eyes, but his gaze fixed squarely on the Ninth Seat. The recently appointed Tenth Seat hadn't been part of the Elite Ten Council until the start of the second year, when Nakiri Erina's departure left one spot vacant. He had been unanimously voted in, with Soma personally vouching for him. Takumi was unsurprised at Ibusaki's defence of his friend. From helping him claim a Seat in the Elite Ten to being a fellow Polar Star Dorm member, it was clear that Ibusaki would take Soma's side whenever the opportunity arose. He never really spoke much, but when he did say something, it was always something profound and wise. At least he _said_ something, much unlike the seventh Seat.

Mimasaka Subaru leant against his chair, arms folded and eyes closed. To any outsider, it would seem that he was paying even less attention than Soma was, but everyone knew the possessor of the Perfect Trace was more attentive than he looked. He always paid the utmost attention during their meetings and conducted his responsibilities with great aplomb. No doubt he was paying close attention to this discussion too, but decided to stay quiet. Takumi assumed that he felt he didn't really have a say in this situation, and Takumi had to agree with him if that was the case.

It seemed an odd choice at the time for Mimasaka to be appointed to the Elite Ten Council, but his performances during the Central battle basically solidified his place in Totsuki's highest position of power. Nevertheless, it was apparent how out of place Mimasaka appeared in contrast to the other members of the Council, and he seemed to acknowledge this as he rarely said anything during their discussions, preferring simply to work on more of his Elite Ten duties or whatever he felt like. One time, Takumi saw him embroidering at the table. He had fought laughter throughout that entire meeting.

"Alright, alright already! I get it!" Soma cried out, clearly irritated at the situation that was quickly spiralling out of control. "Let's just get back to discussing…whatever it was we were talking about. What was it again?"

Takumi sighed.

"We were discussing the arrangements for the first years compulsory 'Totsuki Friendship and Rapport Training Camp!'" The way he emphasised the name of the camp in the impersonation of an excited fan girl elicited laughs from every person present, excluding Mimasaka, of course.

Soma chuckled along with them and looked at them with a determined look in his eyes. Everyone beamed happily. Soma had regained his usual cheerful persona and appeared totally focused. Everything looked hopeful.

Then Takumi fucked up.

Without even thinking, he blurted out, "That's the spirit, Yukihira! Who needs Nakiri anyway?"

Then silence.

Takumi felt every single cell in his body cry out in anguish as his stupid words seemed to echo infinitely in the large room. He audibly flinched and immediately went to apologise, but Soma's smile had already faded and his fists were clenched and his teeth bared and his face twisted into an angry snarl.

"I've told you before…DO NOT say her fucking name in this room! She is NEVER to be mentioned, EVER!" Soma's face was that of pure hatred and his furious expression drew extra attention to the scar on his left eyebrow. It made him look even more intimidating.

It was frightening to think Soma could become this enraged. He was famous for his good nature and infectious happiness. Seeing him like this, a twisted husk of bitterness, really did not suit him, Takumi noted. Especially now his fury was directed entirely towards him.

"Yukihira! I am so-"

"No, Takumi! Just shut the fuck up! I have said TIME AND TIME again that she is not to be mentioned under ANY circumstances! And what do you do? Say her goddamned fucking name! I am sick and _fucking_ tired of hearing her name! I KNOW she was better than me! I can't stand you guys trying to pretend you understand what this shit feels like! To feel this _worthless…_ I'm done with hearing you guys berate me for having FUCKING EMOTIONS!"

With that, Soma stormed towards the doors of the meeting room and stomped away, leaving the other nine members mute and ashamed, none more than Takumi. He felt an unbearable ache of regret emanating from his chest and he felt like he had betrayed his friend.

Everyone else present, including Mimasaka, stared at Takumi, their anger and confusion clearly visible, causing him to feel even guiltier for his irrational outburst.

"Well," Takumi chuckled dryly, "I royally screwed that up."

* * *

Takumi stood outside the door of Room 303, not aware of how much time had passed while he contemplated his options. After he pissed off Soma to the highest degree, Takumi debated whether or not it was a good idea to meet Soma face to face.

On one hand, he had been a loyal friend to Soma ever since Nakiri disappeared, and had helped him out with all of his problems. He was confident that he could be considered one of Soma's best friends, so he had the feeling that Soma would forgive him if he apologised enough.

On the other hand, Soma was _pissed._ He had lost his shit a few times before, but that was the most volatile reaction he had seen from the red-head. Takumi considered whether Soma _could_ forgive after saying something so stupid, his anger possibly overtaking his other emotions.

Takumi took a deep breath and readied himself. He was going in.

He knocked three times and waited for Soma's voice.

A weak voice croaked, "Come in."

Takumi opened the door and winced at the sight of Soma sitting on his bed, his eyes red and his cheeks stained with tears. Soma looked up at Takumi and _smiled_ weakly.

"Yukihira? I just wanna say I am so-"

"Yeah, I know. Me too, man. I didn't want to rage out on you like that," Soma interjected, his exhausted smile relieving Takumi greatly.

"Nah, dude, it's my fault. I shouldn't have said her name."

"It's fine, man. I wouldn't usually have snapped like that, but with everyone agitating me as well, guess I just couldn't take it." Soma grinned at him and Takumi felt _much_ better. He walked up to Soma and stuck out his hand.

"Friends?"

Soma shook it gratefully.

"Of course, Takumi."

Takumi gave a toothy grin.

Soma went back down to sit on his bed, and Takumi took the chair opposite, next to his desk.

"But, man! How pathetic am I?" Soma laughed, "It's been four months and I'm _still_ not over her!"

"Everyone takes a different amount of time to adjust and cope with grief. I know if something happened between me and Megumi, I'd take a while to grieve." Takumi responded as seriously as he could, hoping his words would finally break the First Seat out of his misery.

"You make it seem like Erina died," Soma smirked, "She's just…gone, you know? That's the worst part about it all, she just…left. I wasn't good enough to make her stay." He added sadly, his head dropping,

"Well, maybe it was something you just couldn't control, Yukihira. Maybe it was urgent."

"I mean, what sort of urgent business would force you to leave the best culinary school in Japan?"

"It was that serious, huh? She never really explained at that meeting why she was leaving. She gave that vague explanation, but I mean, it didn't seem like reason enough to any of us. I think she hid the real reason from us."

"Guess her pride wouldn't let her." Soma smiled, raising his head to flash his grin. For all the times he got enraged at the mention of her name, it was blatant how madly in love Soma was with Erina, even after all this time.

"Suppose so." Takumi returned the smile, albeit more sympathetically, but hiding the fact that Soma basically confirmed that he was hiding something. "Do you still remember that meeting?

She seemed kind of…out of it. You know what I mean?"

"God, how could I forget?" Soma replied, a sad smile dancing on his lips.

"I remember it like it was yesterday, you know?"

* * *

Nakiri Erina cleared her throat and looked upon the other members of the Elite Ten Council. She felt her heart pang and realised how much her next words would affect these people. She had grown to respect them all and considered most of them extremely dear friends. She swallowed her trepidation and steeled her voice.

"Everyone, before this meeting ends, I have an announcement to make."

She tried to ignore Soma next to her turn his head in disgust and clench his fists. She seemed to be the only one who noticed.

"What's that, Erina? We've gone through all the other Totsuki business, haven't we?" Alice queried, apparently unaware of Erina's incoming declaration.

"I know, this announcement is about myself."

Everyone in the Council looked at Erina incredulously, confused as to why the First Seat was discussing personal matters at an Elite Ten meeting, with the exception of Soma, who still refused to look in Erina's direction. She didn't blame him.

She noticed Hisako was looking at her, but with a sympathetic look in her eyes. Of course, as her best friend and secretary, she already knew what Erina was about to say. She appreciated her support.

Hayama chuckled, "Are you sure this is really a necessary thing to bring up, Nakiri? You aren't usually one to about yourself."

"I have to agree with him, Nakiri. This is quite unlike you." Alice added, her confusion only growing with each passing second.

"If you'll let me speak, I'm sure I can tell you what-"

"A-Are you sure we have time for this, Nakiri? We'll have to go back to lessons soon…" Megumi said anxiously, her hands fidgeting with the daunting prospect of being late for class. Her timid nature couldn't take it.

"I assure you, it's a quick announcement and shouldn't take longer than a few minutes-"

"Come on then, Nakiri! Don't make us wait in anticipation like this!" Ikumi exclaimed.

"If you'll stop interrupting, I will-"

"But-"

A fist slammed down onto the large table. Soma's fist. Everyone shut up and turned their gazes to him. He looked at them with dark eyes and spoke in a harsh tone, similar to the growl of a wildebeest.

"Let. Her. Speak." He said through gritted teeth, his uncharacteristic anger enough to keep them quiet and paying attention solely to Erina. He sighed heavily and gestured lazily to Erina. "Go on."

"T-Thank you, Soma-kun," Erina stammered, aware of Soma's gaze already turning away from hers. She exhaled in preparation and braced herself to speak.

"Unfortunately, before the start of the second year, I shall depart from Totsuki and study abroad."

The room was deathly silent. Eerily silent. Everyone present was clearly paralysed with shock, with the exception of Hisako, who grimaced and sank into her seat slightly, and Soma, who seemed to be suppressing incredible levels of rage through his bared teeth and furious expression.

Then Alice spoke up.

"W-What on earth are you talking about, Erina? You're _leaving_ Totsuki?" The panic in her voice was evident, and the inevitable tears were already springing up.

"That's what I said, yes," Erina replied calmly, seemingly unfazed by her cousin's tearful state.

"But why the hell are you doing something like that?" Ryo shouted, his anger matching his girlfriend's, his passionate outburst surprising some of the other Council members, Erina included.

"As I said, it's…so I can study abroad. To expand my horizons, and, um, evolve my cooking." Erina's hesitations were not unnoticed by those present, but knew contesting it was a hopeless cause. All except Alice.

"This is ridiculous, Erina! You can't leave Totsuki! You have too much here to leave it all behind!"

"What would you be referring to, Alice?" Erina replied, her amethyst eyes piercing daggers into her cousin's crimson ones, which were filled with tears of anger.

"Who's gonna be First Seat if you're gone?"

"Once everyone hears of my departure, I'll accept any Shokugekis I receive from those who wish to take the Seat. Of course, in the situation where no one beats me, the Second Seat inherits the First Seat and everyone gets promoted along with him."

At that point, everyone in the room gazed at Soma, who looked much calmer, but still not impressed. He had yet to say anything regarding Erina's announcement.

"Yukihira-kun! Aren't you going to say something! You can't let her leave!" Alice shrieked, getting more and more flustered by the second. Soma didn't reply.

"Hey, calm down, Alice!" Takumi said, his efforts to make the snow-haired Nakiri settle down failing miserably, seeming only to agitate her further.

"So that's it? You're just gonna abandon all of us here? You're fine with that?"

Erina hesitated slightly. Just slightly. In fact, it was such an unnoticeable detail that only the most perceptive in the room were able to notice, Alice included. She immediately quieted down.

"Of course not! But this…it's what's best for my future."

"But you don't have to leave, do you? Isn't being at Totsuki enough?" Takumi reasoned, hoping to knock some sense into at least one of the Nakiri women. To no avail, it turned out.

"I'm afraid not, Aldini-kun. It's rather complicated, so I can't go into too much detail, but I assure you all that it's imperative that I do this," Erina's words scalded like lava, but Takumi knew when a situation was hopeless. He sighed in defeat and leant back in his chair.

"S-So…how long do you have left at the school?" Megumi piped up, her own confusion and sadness apparent in her tone of speaking.

"I leave on the first day of summer vacation."

"W-What? You mean…we can't even spend any time with you before you go?" Alice whined, clearly extremely distressed by the sudden turn of events.

"Unfortunately, no. I'll be departing in a week."

"We don't even have any more Council meetings after today's until the end of summer!"

"Exactly. This is my final meeting as First Seat."

No one said anything. They were mostly stunned by this shocking situation, but Soma was merely too enraged to say a word.

"That concludes my announcement. I hereby call this meeting dismissed."

Without skipping a beat, Erina stood up and started walking for the door.

"Yukihira-kun! You've gotta stop her!" Alice exclaimed in desperation.

Soma stayed silent.

"Yukihira! Say something at least, man! You've stayed silent this whole time! You don't have ANYTHING to say?" Hayama shouted, clearly more annoyed with his rival's lack of fight than anything else.

Still, Soma stayed silent.

"Yukihira!" Ryo roared.

"Soma-kun!" Megumi begged.

" _Yukihira!"_ Everyone seemed to bellow at once, all trying to coax Soma into speaking.

Soma stood up. Without even glancing at Erina, he walked over her chair, the one that belonged to the First Seat, and sat down in it with little effort. He stared at Erina, who was now doing the same to him, the both staring deeply into each other's eyes, the emotions emanating from their staring contest indiscernible.

Erina turned and walked out, despite the cries of her former Elite Ten members.

Soma said nothing.

* * *

"Yeah, I get what you mean. Usually, she's pretty focused, but she looked more like I do in the Council meetings," Soma laughed, his oblivious nature clearly not picking up on what Takumi was suggesting.

"No, Soma. I mean it was like, she didn't even want to leave. She didn't seem at all happy that she was leaving Totsuki."

"Well, I mean, she was leaving a lot behind, so obviously she wouldn't be thrilled," Soma dropped his head again, harming himself by remembering the times he had with Erina.

"Soma, I know there's something you're not telling me." Takumi stared at Soma with a deadly serious look in his eyes. Soma flinched and sagged. "It's obvious that Nakiri would have told you why, considering how close the two of you were. Maybe Hisako knew as well, seeing as she was close to Nakiri as well. But you're clearly hiding something from the rest of us. The way you acted at that meeting told me that you were properly _pissed,_ especially after you just took her seat as soon as she left it."

Soma didn't move or speak.

"There's something you're not telling us."

Soma inhaled deeply and gazed at Takumi, tears already welling up in his eyes. Takumi immediately regretted his insistence.

"H-Hey, you don't have to say anything! I'm just…it's not the same anymore. I miss Nakiri and all, but I miss you too, Soma. You've changed, man."

"Of course I have," Soma chuckled, "But you're right. I've been hiding it from you for too long. You've been a great friend the past few months, I'm really grateful I have you around, Takumi."

Takumi beamed.

"I'll tell you what happened. How it went down."

Soma took another breath and wiped his eyes.

"How we broke up."

* * *

 **And that's the end of that chapter! Sorry for the sort of cliffhanger, but what else can you do, eh? Hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

 **Feel free to review with any recommendations or critiques you may have.**

 **Thanks for reading this story, talk to you guys later!**


	3. Chapter 3

**And here's another chapter! Thanks for all the support for this story, I'm glad so many are enjoying my writing! As always, feel free to suggest any ideas or criticisms you may have with the story. Any review is greatly appreciated.**

 **On with the story…**

* * *

It had been quite a normal day for Soma.

As per usual, he had suffered through all of his lessons and most of the lectures he had for the day, most of which were excruciatingly boring, especially for a guy who found himself constantly bogged down with Elite Ten work. He found himself hurrying to complete some paperwork for the next generation's Fall Elections during his last lecture, which was on the history of French cuisine. He typically slacked off during this particular lecture, as he had learned all he needed to from Shinomiya Kojiro and he was sure he could best even the staff at any French dish.

He inwardly whined as his brain groaned and his hand ached from the insurmountable amount of work he had to do. He cursed Isshiki, Megishima and Kuga for refusing to re-join the Elite Ten Council, their reasoning mainly just being that they felt like the first year rebels deserved the seats more. Megishima himself was close to graduation anyway, and Isshiki and Kuga said the responsibilities of Elite Ten weren't something they wanted to take part in. Soma gratefully accepted it at first, and found himself somewhat satisfied when he got Second Seat. But that still meant he still had one more challenge in store, usurping the current First Seat.

Soma grinned to himself.

He and Erina had been together for around two weeks when the new Elite Ten Council, handpicked by the reinstated Nakiri Senzaemon himself. Soma couldn't help but feel a little bias was involved in his decision, with his granddaughter taking the top spot. But he was gracious in defeat, and merely saw it as an opportunity to finally realise his initial goal when he first transferred to Totsuki: taking the top spot. And who better to challenge for it than Nakiri Erina?

Soma had thought their intense rivalry would drive a wedge between their relationship, but in actuality, it had brought them even closer. Somehow, their rivalry intensified even further, and Soma found himself sometimes accepting his fate as second place. Only momentarily, however. His fierce drive and passion weren't about to be cooled just because his rival happened to be his girlfriend as well.

Before he knew it, the lecture was already over, and Soma chuckled at how long he'd been getting all lovey-eyed at Erina. He'd never admit to her how much she was on his mind, his own pride contesting even hers, but he knew it didn't really matter. They had their mutual feelings, and had done for the past four months they'd been together.

As he left the lecture hall, he was immediately greeted by the sight of Takumi and Megumi, waiting outside for him. They were deep in conversation and didn't notice him at first, and Soma took the opportunity to admire the relationship the two had.

He and Erina were typically very heated and passionate when they spoke around others, mostly because Erina always got flustered and embarrassed whenever Soma tried to do anything affectionate. Soma was perfectly fine with it, after all, it was part of who Erina was, and that's exactly the girl who he fell for.

But he had to admit, he was jealous of how calm and composed Megumi was whenever Takumi showed any sort of affection: holding hands, playing with her hair and even quick kisses on the cheek. Soma was actually quite surprised at how calmly she took his affections, initially thinking her shy and timid nature would be the same with her boyfriend, and he definitely thought she'd be just as, if not as, flustered as Erina was. But that clearly wasn't the case, and Soma found himself secretly wishing Erina would act the same way.

The thoughts subsided as Takumi caught sight of Soma, and greeted him warmly.

"Yo, Yukihira! We're going off to the Polar Star Dorm, you coming with?"

"Yeah, sure! Got nothing else to do anyway."

"Oh, really? What about all that Elite Ten work you were moaning about this morning?"

Soma went to reply, but Takumi interrupted him by gasping sarcastically.

"Don't tell me the Second Seat is slacking his class work!" He said in a mocking tone.

"Oh, shut up." Soma laughed. "Being Second Seat's a lot harder than Fifth, you know?"

"Well, Erina's the First Seat, and she seems to be keeping up with her duties without complaining, including her unfortunate status as your boyfriend."

"Aw, come on!" Soma guffawed. "Being with me isn't a full-time job!"

"Coulda fooled me. I still don't know how she even managed to actually confess to you. You're denser than a bag of rocks." Takumi rebutted, his friendly tone softening the harshness of his words.

"Come on, Takumi-kun!" Megumi said, tugging at his arm at the same time. "Stop teasing Soma-kun! He isn't that bad!"

"She's right, you know," Soma added, his grin reaffirming his enjoyment of Megumi's defence of him.

"Fine, fine." Takumi conceded, trying and failing to suppress his broad smile. "Let's go."

They walked to the Polar Star, chatting and exchanging friendly quips as they usually did. Soma still wasn't sure how the conversation turned to talking exclusively about him and Erina, but all he seemed to be doing was answering questions the two had about their relationship.

"Nakiri-san seems quite…distant lately, doesn't she?" Megumi queried, a look of worry palpable on her face.

"Do you think? I mean, she's been quite normal, I'd say." Soma replied casually, not really understanding what Megumi was suggesting.

"I've noticed it too, Yukihira. Maybe you're just somehow too dense to see when your girlfriend is feeling down." Takumi rebutted, his concern for Erina coinciding well with his dig at Soma.

"Do you think? She hasn't acted weird around me, anyway," Soma responded, placing both hands behind his head while he walked. "I'm not sure what it could be anyway. She hasn't said anything out of the ordinary."

"I wonder," Takumi pondered, his brow furrowing as he thought.

"M-Maybe she wants to tell you something?" Megumi thought aloud, her amber eyes filled with concern. Typical Tadokoro, Soma thought, Always so worried for others. Soma grinned. He realised it was nice to have friends like this, who supported him.

"That can't be it, though," Takumi reasoned, "She's been acting weird almost all the time, really. During lessons and lectures, sometimes even during Elite Ten Council meetings, I've noticed."

"Wow, Takumi, you're pretty perceptive." Soma chuckled, glancing back at Takumi as he spoke.

"Maybe you're just very unperceptive," Takumi grinned. "But in all seriousness, Yukihira, I think you should confront Nakiri about this. Our final meeting's tomorrow, so it'd be best if you got it sorted out before then. Then you and Nakiri can do whatever boyfriend-girlfriend stuff you do."

"He's right, Soma-kun. Nakiri-san's always been one to hide her true feelings, so maybe she can't bring herself to tell any of us. But maybe she'd tell you if you asked nicely." Megumi added.

"Yeah, yeah, I get the message. I'll talk to her first chance I get."

That seemed to satisfy the two as they smiled warmly and gave Soma a look as if to say _Good job!_

They continued walking for a few more minutes, chatting mostly about their excitement in moving up to second year and other gossip, such as Ryo and Alice being seen going in some storage shed and not leaving for a few hours, supposedly. Soma laughed at that particular rumour. He wondered who could've concocted such an amusing falsity, Hisako probably. Maybe in revenge to Alice possibly starting the rumour that she had skipped out on helping Erina with her duties to spend the day with Hayama. Soma always found their, for lack of a better word, rivalry in one-upping each other with more humiliating stories very amusing.

"Don't you think it's funny how the members of the Elite Ten are hooking up so much?" Soma giggled, especially at the sight of Megumi and Takumi blushing fiercely.

"W-What are you talking about, Yukihira?" Takumi stuttered, caught off guard by Soma's sudden statement.

"Well, you know, me and Erina, you guys, Alice and Kurokiba, Hisako and Hayama…Seems the only ones not together are Mimasaka and Nikumi…" Soma burst out laughing. "You don't think those two will get it on, do you?"

"What the hell are you on about?" Takumi chuckled, pretty confused at Soma's inane questions.

"Nah, it's nothing," Soma guffawed, "Just thought it was strange, is all."

Before Takumi could respond with another good-natured insult to Soma's strange comments, the Polar Star Dorm loomed within sight and Soma turned to face the two of them.

"Welp, this is our stop." He gestured to the ancient building as he spoke.

"Yeah, I'll head off," Takumi replied.

"Awwww, come on, Takumi-kun! Can't you stay a bit longer?" Megumi whined, clutching her boyfriend's arm possessively.

"Sorry, Megumi. But I think Isami's gotta be waiting for me about now, don't wanna worry him, Definitely another time though!" He gave his girlfriend a quick peck on the cheek, and turned and walked in the opposite direction, waving goodbye as he disappeared over the hill.

"Come on, Tadokoro, let's go in!" Soma said, already opening the doors to the entrance.

"Right behind you!" She called, following him in.

They entered the dorm, taking the same route to their rooms since they were so close to each other. As Soma bid farewell, he heard a door behind him open, and Nakiri Erina stepped out.

Soma turned to greet her, and gave her his typical goofy smile.

"Hey, Erina! You alright?"

"I'm…fine, thanks, Soma-kun." Erina hesitantly smiled.

Soma frowned. Was this what Takumi was talking about? Erina acting…weird? He brushed off his perplexed expression and replaced with another toothy grin.

"You mind if I come in?"

"O-Of course not…" Erina stammered, acting how she usually did when she was alone with Soma. Soma smiled. Takumi and Megumi must be imagining things. She's just the same old Erina, he thought.

As he walked into her room, Soma heard Erina close the door behind him, and he felt her arms wrap around his midsection. He didn't move, letting her nestle her head on his shoulder and nuzzle him gently. He waited for her to say something, but she remained silent, merely enjoying the warmth Soma radiated on her.

Soma felt slightly confused. Erina was never really this affectionate unless he instigated it. She rarely ever made bold moves like this. Still, he wasn't about to complain about the feeling of Erina's embrace and made no move to break their contact.

They stayed like that, unaware of how much time had really passed.

"S-Soma-kun?" Erina whispered, her trembling lips barely giving voice to her thoughts.

"What's up?" Soma replied, turning his head slightly over his shoulder to properly see her. Unsurprisingly, her face was flushed red, and she refused to make direct eye contact with him.

"C-Can I ask you something?"

"Of course, go ahead." Soma wondered what was so important that Erina felt the need to open up their conversation was hugging him tightly.

"H-How long have you liked me?"

"Eh? That's a bit out of the blue! Why do you ask?" Soma responded, the shock he was feeling evident in his voice.

"I-I was just wondering, that's all! Forget about it, it doesn't mat-"

"Nah, I can tell you. Just got a bit confused for a sec there. Sorry." Soma flashed a grin. "Hmmm…How long have I liked you? I mean, I guess it was kinda the same as you, really. That feeling was there, but it wasn't until you confessed that it became obvious, you know?"

"But, I mean, when did you get that feeling?"

"Ummm…I guess…when I heard what your father did to you as a child."

"W-What?" Erina teased and, through the glimpse Soma caught of her face, she winced as if in pain. Soma regretted his mentioning of Nakiri Azami. Despite being exiled from Totsuki four months ago after the rebels' victory in the Regiment de Cuisine, Erina still shuddered at the sound of her father's name. It was obvious some emotional scars would remain, but Soma noticed how she hadn't really improved in stomaching the mention of her father. It worries him sometimes, but he knew bringing it up would make it even worse. And that was exactly what he did. He immediately tried to rectify his situation.

"I mean, I felt really bad, and then, I guess I kinda got the feeling that the animosity you had since we met was 'cause of that. I suppose the feeling was always there, but I just suppressed it since I had the mindset that, you know, it's Nakiri Erina. She'd never return my feelings anyway. Heh, how surprising was it when you confessed!" Soma chuckled, hoping to cheer up the blonde. The fond memory filled his mind, causing him to grin involuntarily.

"S-Shut up! It's embarrassing whenever you bring that up!" Erina blushed, and buried her head further into Soma's shoulder, if that was even possible. She had seemed to calm down, at least, so Soma took it as a success.

"You always get embarrassed when I mention it!" He laughed.

"S-Stop it!"

Soma just laughed harder.

"So why do you ask?"

"H-Huh? W-What do you mean?"

"Well, it was quite a random thing to bring up, you know?"

Soma felt Erina hesitate and, as much as it pained him to do so, broke off their embrace to look her directly.

"Is something wrong, Erina?"

Erina remained silent.

"ERINA," Soma said stronger, shaking her shoulders gently, trying to elicit any sort of reaction from her.

"Soma-kun…I'm sorry…"

"What on earth are you talking about? What are you sorry for?"

She didn't reply again, and Soma saw tears splashing onto her cheeks. He flinched at the sight.

"Erina…?"

"I…"

Erina looked up through tear-soaked eyes and gazed into Soma's eyes. As golden orbs clashed with purple, Soma felt his heart shatter as she spoke.

"I'm leaving Totsuki."

Silence.

More silence.

Soma just stared incredulously at Erina, unable to say anything. Every emotion within him swirled around him, filling him with all kinds of questions. However, he had only the strength to ask one.

"Why?" He croaked, the pain he was experiencing apparent through his voice.

Erina wiped away her tears with a shaky sleeve and took a deep breath.

"I'm not strong enough."

"What in the hell are you talking about?" Soma shouted, a little too loudly that he wanted. He had never raised his voice at Erina before, and it wasn't something he relished.

"It's…too much. Everyday, I have to be reminded of him…I thought I could handle it, but I just can't stand it anymore."

"Are you talking about your father? Why the hell would you leave Totsuki because of him?" He and Erina had fought before, but they were more playful than anything. But this, it was much more volatile. Soma hated it, but he no longer had control of his words. He had been taken over by his anger.

"It's too many bad memories. I know you wouldn't understand, but believe me, it's difficult for me too!"

"This is ridiculous, Erina! You can't just abandon everyone here! You…you can't abandon me…"

"I'm not abandoning you! I just…can't be at this school anymore…"

Soma remarked at how calm Erina was being. While he was screaming and shouting his head off, she refused to raise her voice and while speaking shakily, still managed to come off as composed.

"Are you SERIOUS?" Soma yelled, convinced at this point everyone in the Dorm could hear them, even if they weren't listening through the speaking tubes in the room. "You just gonna LEAVE cause you're having bad memories of your dad? Do you think that's FAIR to ANY of us? Your FRIENDS?"

" _Stop shouting at me_!" Erina retorted, breaking her calm demeanour and mirroring Soma's angry outbursts. "You think this is EASY for me? You think I WANT to do this? This is _tearing_ me apart, having to leave you guys! But I thought _you_ , of all people, would sympathise with me!"

"How the _hell_ could I sympathise with you? You're leaving me and our friends behind because of some sour past? That shouldn't matter anymore! Have the past few months not meant _anything_ to you?"

He didn't want to say this. He had to apologise. He needed to.

But his body wouldn't let him. The anger residing within him was exploding outwards, and it had no intention of stopping. Soma was forced to watch himself berate and shout at the woman who didn't deserve any of it.

" _How dare_ you? You think I'm doing this to _spite_ you? You think our time together hasn't been the best of my life? You said it yourself, you know how terrible my childhood was! You _know_ the cruelties I had to suffer! You have _no right_ to get mad at me for wanting to escape these awful memories!"

"Well, I'm sorry for getting angry when I hear that my girlfriend wants to leave me just because I haven't been good enough in distracting her from her tragic past! Get the fuck over yourself!" He screwed his eyes shut in rage.

He swore. He never swore at Erina. _Dear God, why am I saying these things? I need to stop! Please, God, make it stop!_

He forced his eyes open. He hated the sight. Erina was looking at him in disgust. Even before they got together, she had never looked at him with such… _contempt_. Soma stifled a choke of despair. Then, her face twisted into a snarl of pure anger and she starting screaming at the top of her lungs.

"You think this is a _breakup_? You think I'm telling you this to transition into some long-winded break-up speech? Is that what you _want_?"

"It seems to be what YOU want! Why the hell don't we, if you can't stand the sight of me anymore?"

"God, HOW self-centred are you? This isn't ALL about _you_! I have a lot more to care about than JUST YOU!"

Her words stung, Soma couldn't deny that. But he deserved them. Every single one.

"Well, if that's how you feel, let's do it! Let's fucking break up!"

 _Why? Why the hell am I saying this? This isn't how I feel at all!_

Erina looked incredibly wounded. She rarely let her guard fully down around Soma, but now, she was utterly devastated. Soma fought to keep the tears that were welling up in his eyes.

"FINE! I don't need you anyway!" She shouted, each word a bullet that injured him further. "Get the HELL out of my room! NOW!"

"With _pleasure_!" Soma retorted bitterly, and stormed out of the room, intentionally knocking into her as he passed.

She slammed the door behind him, and he was alone in the hallway.

He was facing Megumi's room. _God, poor girl must've heard everything. She must be completely terrified._

Soma turned numbly, every nerve in his body jangled as he approached his room. His legs were weak and threatened to collapse at any second. His mouth was dry and sore from all the screaming. His heart hurt.

He fell onto the bed and gazed blankly at the ceiling, completely destroyed from the horrifying turn of events.

He faintly heard Erina's sobbing through the wall.

He cried too.

* * *

"…"

"Fuck, dude. That's…that's rough." Takumi whispered, failing to find his voice strongly after hearing of the awful story Soma told him.

He chuckled humourlessly, his face clearly showing his misery. "It's my fault. I pushed her away. I wasn't good enough…to be an attentive boyfriend. If I actually cared about her, I should've supported her! I should've…" Soma trailed off, fists clenched and teeth gritted.

"I…God, man. I'm so sorry you had to go through that."

"It was worse for her, I'm sure. I'm certain she doesn't even wanna hear my voice. She was leaving Totsuki cause she had bad memories there, and she left with even more."

"So that excuse to study abroad…?"

"She hasn't gone abroad. She's still in Japan. Hisako told me she's just doing a tour around all the prefectures, to 'expand her horizons.' No doubt she's skipping ours."

"And all those times you flipped your shit?"

"I'm just pissed at myself. Whenever I think of her, it just hurts cause…I know how badly I fucked up. Hell, I could still be with her if I had just taken the news respectfully! Just…I hate when I think of her…because it reminds me of what I lost. I know there's probably some part of me that resents her for leaving, but…I know it's not her fault. I'm the one who got angry first. I instigated the whole shitfest. It's why I feel especially bad when I get angry at you guys for bringing her up. I already lost someone close to me cause I overreacted and drove them away. I'd hate it if I did that to any of you guys."

"I-It's fine, man. After hearing that, I can't get mad at you for anything. You've gone through so much."

Soma smiled weakly.

"But you said that everyone in the dorm heard you guys? Including Megumi? She never said anything to me…"

"After Erina announced her departure at the Elite Ten meeting, I pulled Megumi aside and asked her to tell the other Polar Star guys not to tell anyone about it. They're unbelievably loyal. They've haven't said a word of it to anyone."

Takumi stayed silent.

"Sorry it took me so long to tell you the truth. I'm…already starting to feel better." He gave a shaky grin to try and back up his statement, but it only testified to outline his lie.

"Don't worry about it, Yukihira. It's understandable, really. I don't hold it against you."

"Thanks, man. That…means a lot."

"But, Yukihira," Takumi began, unsure of how to ask Soma what he saw as a pretty obvious question. "Have you actually tried contacting Nakiri?"

Soma scoffed.

"You think she'd wanna talk to me after the things I said?"

"I'm not asking if she'd want to talk to you, I'm asking if you ever made the effort to reach out to her."

Soma hesitated.

"No. Never."

"Well, why don't you? You could apologise to her and fix your relationship!"

"I don't see the point. I'd just be reopening old wounds that don't need to be. If I get a hold of her, somehow, she'd just reject me immediately and I'd be left feeling even shittier."

"But you haven't even tried! You never know, maybe she'd like to bury the hatchet and stop your bad blood."

Soma stayed silent, clearly in thought. After a few seconds, he sagged.

"If I were her, I'd never want to speak to me again."

"You still have feelings for her, don't you?"

Soma nodded in defeat.

"Then what's the real harm in trying?"

Soma contemplated the options.

"I'll think about it."

"Well, it's a start," Takumi chuckled.

"You know, it's stupid, but sometimes I find myself wondering if she ever thinks about me, wherever she is…"

"Who knows?"

* * *

Nakiri Erina lay in bed, thinking about Soma. Yet again.

It was a typical night for her for the past few months. Every time she closed her eyes to drift off into a peaceful slumber, thoughts of him would immediately infiltrate her brain and she was unable to push him out.

She still had feelings for him, she knew that for sure. Somewhere deep down, despite his words on the day they broke up, she still retained her feelings for him. She still felt the same whenever he crossed her mind, butterflies went crazy in her stomach, her heart would beat furiously and she found her lips curve into a small smile.

She knew it was ridiculous. She knew Soma hated her for what she did. It was pointless to entertain the notion that they could get back together.

And yet…

There she was, staring at her phone, waiting for the call that would never come. They had each other's numbers, she knew that for a fact. She still had him listed in her contacts, but knew it wouldn't be wise to initiate any form of contact.

She wanted to.

She wanted to hear his voice.

She missed him.

She had only realised too late how foolish she was in leaving Totsuki to escape from the bad memories of her father. In reality, she had simply been ditching the only opportunity she had of replacing those bad memories with better ones. With her friends. With Soma.

It was stupid. She knew it was. Life wasn't shoujo manga, after all. It was much crueller and unforgiving. Nothing could have prepared her for the agony she felt after that heated argument with Soma.

She checked the time. 1:46.

She rolled her eyes and sighed. It was shaping to be yet another restless night.

Then the phone rang.

Her heart lurched, her mind raced. She found herself gasping audibly and she felt sweat beads forming on her forehead.

She immediately accepted the call and pressed the phone to her ear.

"Hello?"

"We need to talk." The voice spoke.

* * *

 **Another cliffhanger? Wow, I'm terrible, aren't I? Hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

 **Also, we finally see Erina in the present day! Yay! Took long enough, didn't it?**

 **Feel free to review with any recommendations or critiques you may have.**

 **Thanks for reading this story, talk to you guys later!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey, guys! Here's another chapter for you all! A big thanks to everyone who's reviewed, you guys definitely motivate me to keep my schedule! This was probably the hardest chapter for me to write, and you'll find out soon enough…**

 **As always, feel free to suggest any ideas or criticisms you may have with the story. Any review is greatly appreciated.**

On with the story…

"Hello?"

"We need to talk." The voice spoke.

Erina felt her shoulders sag and her heart sink. It wasn't Soma. She inwardly laughed at her naivety. _Of course, there's no way he'd ever call me. How many times am I going to fool myself into getting my hopes up?_

"Erina-sama?" The voice said after a few seconds of no response.

"I'm here, Hisako," Erina responded, trying, and failing, to keep the disappointment out of her voice.

"Thought it was Soma again?" Hisako asked sympathetically, her comforting tone making Erina feel horrible yet again that she treated her best friend like this.

"Yeah, sorry."

Ever since she left Totsuki four months ago to travel around Japan, she had only kept close contact with Hisako, her closest friend and secretary. Erina knew it wasn't necessary for Hisako to call her almost daily, but she appreciated that she cared enough to want to make sure she was okay. More often than not, she wasn't. And Hisako knew this.

"Please don't worry about it, Erina-sama."

Hisako was the only one from Totsuki who knew where she was, so it was unsurprising that she was the only one she kept in touch with. She had meant to tell Soma as well, but…

"Hisako, why are you calling so late? It's almost 2 o'clock," Erina yawned, the adrenaline from her brief hope of talking to Soma fading quickly.

"I apologise for contacting you so late, but I assure you, it's _urgent_ ," Hisako spoke, the seriousness in her words making Erina frown. Hisako had shown that she was able to be serious, but this time felt like what she was about to say was a matter of life or death.

"Well, what is it?" Erina replied, slightly irritated and slightly intrigued at Hisako's vague words.

"You _need_ to come back to Totsuki at the earliest time."

Erina sighed.

"Hisako, we've been over this before, I already said-"

"No, Erina-sama. You don't understand. You _have_ to come back."

"But why, Hisako. You know there's only one reason why I would return to Totsuki…" Erina paused. _It couldn't be…_

"Erina-sama. It's Yukihira."

Erina felt her heart lurch and beat faster at the mention of his name. She could envision him perfectly. His unkempt, messy hair. That scar on his eyebrow. That cocky, smug, damn irresistible smile…

"W-What does this have to do with Soma-kun?"

"Erina-sama, you need to see him."

She felt faint. She wasn't ready for this. She had been expecting just to talk to him, now Hisako was saying she had to see him face to face again? She couldn't do it.

"T-That's ridiculous, Hisako! Why should I do that?"

"Erina-sama, you can try to fool yourself, but I know what you want. It's obvious how much you want to see Yukihira."

Erina flinched. Of course, she was right. There was no fooling Hisako.

"Even so, what makes you think Soma wants to see _me_? In case you forgot what happened between me and Soma, he made it pretty clear that he didn't want anything to do with me."

"Erina-sama, you don't know how bad he's gotten. Today, he absolutely lost his mind and verbally assaulted poor Takumi, just because he happened to mention you."

Erina felt sick to her stomach. Soma really hated her that much. The mere mention of her name made him _that_ enraged…

Erina blinked back tears.

"W-Why are you telling me this? Are you trying to remind me of how much he despises me?" Erina found herself getting more and more flustered as she spoke, trying to mask her despair.

"No, Erina-sama! It's…it's the complete opposite."

Erina stopped.

"What do you mean?"

"Listen, Erina-sama. I've been…talking with Soma the past few months," Hisako seemed unsure of her words, and Erina waited for her to continue, unable to say anything.

"I wasn't going to say anything at first but…he was desperate. He's still madly in love with you, Erina-sama."

Erina was speechless.

"He begged me, Erina-sama. Begged me to tell him where you had gone. I didn't want to tell him at first, not after what you said happened between you two but…That sadness in his voice, he was…breaking down. I felt for him so I said that you were travelling around Japan. We've talked occasionally, and he just asks if you're okay and…if you're happy."

Erina tensed, her throat closed up and her body became paralysed.

"He…he said that?" She choked out, her words barely making it past her lips.

"Yes, he…was very concerned about you. I asked him once why he didn't contact you himself, but he just said that he knew you wouldn't want to talk to him."

Before Erina could interject, Hisako continued quickly.

"I know, I know, I tried telling him he was wrong, but he just wouldn't hear it. He refused to believe that you didn't despise him."

Erina felt a tear trickle down her cheek and she screwed her eyes shut and cursed herself over and over again.

It hadn't been long since she left that Erina realised how badly she had messed up.

She had believed, in her naivety, that by leaving Totsuki, she'd be able to rid herself of the horrific experiences she endured due to her father. She had abandoned all she had cared about because she was foolish enough to believe that if she left, so too would the traumatising memories.

She was wrong.

The nightmares she frequently had while her father was director of Totsuki resurfaced violently, and Erina found herself all alone, with no one to comfort her through it.

She wanted to come back. Every single day, her brain would scream at her to ditch the exploration of the country and go back to Totsuki. Back to Soma.

But she knew she couldn't face him.

His words…

His expression filled with nothing but hatred and malice…

It had been quite obvious to her at the time that Soma wanted nothing to do with her. And she understood completely.

In Soma's eyes, Erina was betraying him. They had spent four wonderful months of their lives together, and she just ditched him because she was weak. Even if she wanted to go back, she knew she couldn't. She wouldn't be able to handle the way Soma would look at her.

She regretted it every day.

She had nothing to fear. Her father had been exiled from Totsuki and prevented from ever being within its space again. Her grandfather was director of Totsuki once again. She had finally been freed of the burden she had carried ever since she was a child. It should've been the start of a new life. And yet…

If only she could go back and fix her lack of judgment, she would still happily be with Soma and all her friends. But now, she was stuck in an empty hotel room on the other side of the country.

And all alone.

She had tried to escape from the disturbing thoughts that plagued her mind, but in the end, she was only escaping from the only chance she had of replacing those bad memories with good ones.

Her poor judgment and thinking had cost her her happiness.

"Erina-sama?"

"I-I'm…I'm still here, Hisako. Sorry, I just…blanked out for a second," Erina replied with a trembling voice, wiping tears away with her sleeve as she spoke.

"I know you've said before that you wanted to come back, but the only thing stopping you was that you couldn't bear Soma's reaction. Well, I'm telling you, Erina-sama, he will be _ecstatic_ to see you."

"But wait, Hisako, if you knew this, why didn't you say this before?"

"It…was a mistake on my part. When I started talking to Yukihira, it was only a week or so after you left. I wrongly assumed one of you would have moved on by now. I'm sorry."

"I see," Erina mumbled, barely able to register anything except the fact that she may be able to see Soma again.

"I'm sorry for keeping it a secret from you, Erina-sama. Soma asked me not to tell you that we talked. Normally, under any circumstances, I would not have hidden this from you. But I was concerned that by telling you, it would have hurt you even more."

"It's fine, Hisako. I know you only had my best interests at heart."

"Thank you, Erina-sama," Hisako replied, audibly relieved by Erina's words.

"But how am I going to show up? I've already been replaced in the Elite Ten Council, and I'm officially no longer a member of the school…" Erina's heart sank yet again. There goes her chance. Gone as soon as it appeared. All hope was lost.

"Actually…" Hisako began, and Erina immediately perked up.

"I spoke with your grandfather once, and he mentioned how he was 'confident' that you'd return to Totsuki, so he kind of…hid your departure from the records."

"He _what_?" Erina spoke in a shocked tone, even as a small smile crept onto her lips. That grandfather of hers was even more shrewd than she was, and for once, she was thankful for his sneaky behaviour.

"I suppose he knew that your departure wouldn't be permanent. How he knew, I have no idea, but it means that if you wanted, you could easily return to Totsuki."

Once again, Erina was speechless. She had waited for this day for so long, and yet, she couldn't find any words to truly express how she felt.

"I…thank you, Hisako. Thank you so much." Erina spoke warmly, her grin spreading widely from ear to ear.

"Erina-sama, if you _are_ going to come back…be careful. Soma may still have feelings for you, that much is certain, but he's become…unpredictable since you left. The conversations we've had never actually indicated as to _how_ he would react if he saw you again. He may still be hurting immensely from then, and seeing you again may just make it worse."

"I understand, Hisako. Thank you for your concern, but I've made my decision. I'll be boarding the next available flight," Erina couldn't stop her grinning. Her heart raced at the prospect of seeing him again. She couldn't wait.

"That is…wonderful news. I'm happy for you, Erina-sama," Hisako responded warmly, her glee apparent in her voice.

"Thank you, Hisako," Erina smiled, then hung up the phone. She placed her phone down and smiled even further.

She was excited. Being able to see her friends again. Being able to see him again.

She had her mind set on it.

She was going to make amends with Soma, no matter what.

Soma awoke from another nightmare. No surprises what, or _who_ , it was about. He felt better though, having gotten a lot of his grievances off his chest. He would definitely have to thank Takumi once he saw him. He was feeling better. A lot better. For the first time after waking up, Soma smiled. Today was going to be a good day.

His conversation with Takumi had not been forgotten, but after another long restless night, Soma realised how fruitless it was in contacting Erina. Sure, it would be worth a shot, but his constant reminders of Erina would certainly grow much more harrowing should he experience the pain of being rejected for a second time by the same woman.

He hadn't given up on it completely, but for the time being, Soma was comfortable with his curiosity unsatisfied.

With the first years' training camp almost upon them, Soma found himself drowning in paperwork to do as First Seat. It wasn't ideal, but he didn't complain. He was no longer keeping all of his anguish to himself. After sharing his problems with Takumi, and strangely even Hisako, he definitely felt more positive. He apologised to everyone for his outburst the previous day, and everyone just seemed relieved that he was much cheerier than yesterday.

Soma smiled.

He still missed Erina, of course. That wasn't going to disappear just because he talked about his problems a few times. He still had feelings for her, too. Those weren't going away anytime soon either. But Soma didn't brood about it. He no longer looked upon those memories with sorrow or anger. Whenever he remembered his times with Erina, (excluding one particular memory, of course) he caught himself grinning stupidly.

His memories of Erina were no longer corrupted.

That pang of sadness still remained sometimes, and sometimes Soma wasn't able to smile and press on. Some memories left serious wounds that made Soma pause and morosely recall the painful details. But he was optimistic. For the first time in four months, Soma was determined to move forward and not wallow in the past.

His friends noticed his sudden change in mood and, while cautious, accepted his newly found cheeriness and were pleased the Soma they used to know was coming back.

Soma was pleased too.

His school day over and with no real objective, Soma found himself wandering the hallways of Totsuki, passing all sorts of kitchens and lecture halls. He let himself get lost in his own thoughts and, unintentionally, the former princess of Totsuki emerged. He froze. He started trembling.

He let his guard down.

He held his hands out in front of him and tried to stop them from shaking so violently. He took deep breaths. _Guess it'll take more than one good day to stop her from coming across my mind constantly. It's an improvement, anyway._

Normally, he would have broken down into tears at this point, but knowing he couldn't let his friends down again, Soma had gained immense strength. The visions still stung, but at least he could control his emotions better. He was getting a grip on himself.

"Hey, Yukihira-kuuuun?" A voice jolted him out of his thoughts and he looked up to see Nakiri Alice standing before, strangely without Kurokiba by her side.

"Huh? Oh, hey, Alice. What's up?" Soma said as plainly as he could, trying to mask the strong emotions riled up in him.

"You're looking quite strange, you know? Standing in the middle of a hallway, clenching your fists and breathing deeply…" She spoke in a playful tone, clearly mocking Soma for his erratic behaviour. Obviously, she meant no ill nature towards him, but Soma couldn't help but feel wounded.

Soma cursed under his breath. No one was supposed to see him like this. Everyone had the mindset that Soma was improving, that he was getting stronger.

And yet, there she was. Admitting she'd seen the entire ordeal.

"Heh, yeah. Guess I look a bit strange," Soma added a good natured chuckle, but stopped as he saw Alice staring daggers at him.

Soma tripped on his words, not knowing how to react to her sudden change in behaviour. He considered a multitude of questions, but kept it simple and tried to steer the conversation away from him.

"Where's Kurokiba, then?"

Alice didn't break her gaze on Soma and her expression remained the same. Nevertheless, she answered his question.

"He's gone out somewhere with Hayama, probably. Despite the demonic aura those two give off, they get on like peas in a pod."

Soma didn't really know what was really happening. She answered his question like they were having a normal conversation, but her crimson eyes scowling at him told a different story altogether. _She may just be in a bad mood or something. Best to just talk to her normally._

"Then why aren't you with Hisako?"

Despite her insistence on louring at Soma, Alice cracked a small smile.

"You think I'm buddy-buddy with the secretary? Heh, that's pretty funny."

"Well, I mean, why aren't you?"

"I know she's hiding something from me, from _us_ , about Erina. I know it."

Soma tensed. He'd pressured Hisako into spilling the beans to him, but promised he wouldn't tell another living soul. Such was both of their loyalties to Erina.

"You…you mean…even you don't know where she's gone?"

The glare intensified.

"I _know_ it was an excuse! The Erina I know wouldn't just ditch the country at such a random time," Alice was getting more and more worked up, the anger inside her bubbling up through her throat and into her words.

"I, I mean, who knows, really?" Soma laughed weakly, doing a pitiful job in hiding the fact that he knows something.

Alice narrowed her eyes.

"Yukihira-kun."

Soma paused.

"You're a terrible liar."

Soma flinched, but sagged, knowing he'd been caught. He chuckled dryly, but didn't say anything.

"You know something about Erina that we don't."

Soma stayed silent, knowing he shouldn't risk accidentally revealing too much and betraying the trust of those he promised to.

"Yukihira-kun! I'm her goddamned cousin!" Alice suddenly shrieked, making Soma jump and striking fear through his body. He only just noticed how intimidating the snow-haired Nakiri could be if she wanted.

"I deserve to know what's happened to her!" She choked, tears already welling up in her eyes.

Soma winced. Seeing Alice like this reminded him of himself, crying over Erina and obsessed with her whereabouts. He knew how awful it felt, and he strongly felt like telling the truth.

"Why have you only come now to ask, if you know that I'm hiding something?"

"I didn't. I had my suspicions when you didn't say anything during that meeting, when you acted like you were experiencing it a second time. But yesterday confirmed it for me. The way you freaked out told me that you know where Erina is, or what she's doing at least, and she either rejected you when you reached out…or you haven't reached out at all."

Soma just stared incredulously at the crimson-eyed vixen. _How the hell is she that damn perceptive?_

The extent of knowledge the two Nakiris possessed truly frightened him. Soma flinched as Erina crossed his mind again, and in his flustered and vulnerable state, his body betrayed him as his lips curved into a sad frown.

"So I am right," she said simply as she observed his glum expression.

"Yeah," Soma muttered miserably.

"I know you're trying to be all strong now after that freak-out, and you're trying to pretend that it still doesn't hurt, but anyone with half a brain could see that you're lying."

Soma faltered and sighed. _Guess I've still got a loooong way to go._

"Why did you think Erina didn't tell you the real reason why she left?" He said.

Soma saw the faintest hint of hesitation within the Third Seat, but just as quickly as he noticed it, she had regained her composure and was gazing at him with a steeled expression.

"I have no clue. I had assumed we'd keep in touch at least, but whenever I tried to contact her, it appears she either not receiving my messages or…she's simply ignoring me."

Soma sighed. He knew he only had two choices: Outright refuse to tell her or tell her everything. Neither option appealed to him very much. On one hand, he had just begun trying to rekindle his friendships with everyone after his stint of agonising depression, so he had no intentions of ruining his friendship with Alice the same day he made this goal. But on the other hand, telling her everything would mean he broke the promise he made with Hisako. Either way he looked at it, he would potentially destroy a friendship.

But the latter option, no matter its appeals, would mean he would have to betray Erina. Even for all his bravado, that was something he didn't have the strength to do.

"Sorry, Alice," he grinned shakily. "I don't have the answers you want."

"Now I know you're lying! You know exactly what I want to hear!" She retorted angrily, her face burning almost as red as her eyes.

"What I can tell you…is that it isn't your fault. The blame…lies on me."

Alice froze and stared at Soma in confusion. But before she could respond, Soma turned and quickly walked off in the other direction, leaving the girl to reflect on everything just said.

Soma did more aimless wandering after that. He had managed to complete his Elite Ten work for the day, and felt the urge to just walk with no destination. It was quite liberating.

That is, until he stumbled upon the Nakiri Mansion. It was completely coincidental, although considering his current state, that may not have the case. Perhaps it was an unconscious choice to show up here. He knew the exact reason why his body had taken him here without his knowing.

He passed through the security with ease, his several visits to the mansion meaning the guards stationed there had no reason to stop him walking in.

He walked through the front door, unlocked funnily enough. It sounded empty. Despite being a residence for those of the Nakiri bloodline, rarely many lived here. The director was never around unless it was urgent enough to pry him away from his work. Nakiri Alice began to more recently bunk with her partner, Ryo. Erina…well…

The only person he recognised that still lived here was Arato Hisako.

Despite Erina leaving, Hisako remained in the Nakiri Mansion. Maybe it was out of respect for her mistress or perhaps she had just gotten used to life there, whatever the reason, Arato Hisako was a resident of the estate. And the reason he was here.

He'd promised himself that he would try to stop visiting her, but his run-in with Alice made it impossible for him not to want to check up on Erina. Hisako had been unbelievably helpful over the past few months, providing an ear for Soma to talk to if Takumi wasn't available or providing information regarding her mistress' activities.

He didn't know whether he had thanked her for her support. She had definitely contributed to helping Soma into his current state, where he believed he could reasonably move forward and stop dwelling on the past. He decided that he would thank her when he saw her.

He stepped into Erina's room. It had always hurt to walk into this room, where Soma had shared even more memories with the former First Seat. Despite her rarely staying in this room, preferring her one in the Polar Star where she could be closer to Soma, they had definitely shared some pleasant experiences here too. Luckily for Soma, his current mood meant that he reflected on those memories with a smile on his lips, and not tears on his cheeks.

He didn't spend much time mulling over the times he spent in the room, and instead proceeded to the adjoining room next to it. It was where she usually was. Since she was no longer required as Erina's secretary, she spent most of her time toiling away at her Elite Ten work or with her boyfriend, Hayama. It seemed the only other significant thing she did was her conversations with Soma.

When he pushed the door open, he didn't expect the room to be empty. He frowned slightly, feeling like he wasted a trip, when he saw a note placed on her bed, seemingly untouched.

 _"Nakiri-san, if you're reading this, then I may still be at the airport. I apologise for taking so long, but I shall contact you as soon as possible regarding the issue you spoke about earlier._

 _Regards, Hisako."_

Soma placed the note back on the bed in its original position and stuffed his hands in his pockets and exhaled deeply. He ambled out of Hisako's room and back into Erina's. He pondered whether he should wait for her or walk back to the Polar Star, and had started for the door, but he didn't have enough time to make it two steps when the door opened in front of him.

He had expected to see Hisako on the other side, but the sight in front of him was _definitely_ a completely different story.

Soma acknowledged something heavy being dropped, maybe like a bag, but his attention was transfixed on the person who dropped it.

Amethyst eyes that widened in shock as they fell upon Soma's returning gaze.

Long, luxurious golden locks that flowed as her head snapped back in surprise.

Those soft lips that gaped in astonishment.

Nakiri Erina stood before Yukihira Soma.

Yukihira Soma stood before Nakiri Erina.

Neither said anything.

 **And it's a hat trick! Yes, the reason this was soooo difficult to write was because I had to stop there! Yet another cliffhanger, and just when it was getting good? Yep, I'm truly an evil person. Despite that, I hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

 **Feel free to review with any recommendations or critiques you may have.**

 **Thanks for reading this story, talk to you guys later!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello, all! I suppose I owe you guys an explanation for the lateness of this chapter, especially considering how it's taken me way too many months to update. I had anticipated that this would happen, not as soon as it has though. With the constant updating of this story, I knew at some point or another I would burn out and need a rest. I only thought it would take a few weeks but considering I started school recently and was swamped with work from the offset, the motivation hasn't entirely been there. I had hoped to get at least this chapter out before that happened, especially given the cliffhanger of the previous update, but I guess I couldn't do that. I apologise for disrupting the schedule, and I hope I can revive my previous update times. Hopefully, this chapter makes up for an almost year-long absence, I do read all the reviews and I'm sorry to those I kept waiting. But without further ado…**

 **Here's another chapter for you! Thanks to those who reviewed and gave their support for this story! I'm really glad that my writing is apparently a lot better than I gave it credit for, and I have you guys to thank for that. You all have my deepest gratitude!**

 **As always, feel free to suggest any ideas or criticisms you may have with the story. Any review is greatly appreciated.**

 **On with the story…**

* * *

How much time had passed? Soma couldn't even tell. He'd lost track the second he made eye contact. So many emotions raged within him, begging to be free, but their cries fell on deaf ears. Soma couldn't even move, let alone say or express anything. He felt his throat clench and his mouth was unbearably dry. His legs had frozen in place and he didn't think his eyes could get any wider. Memories flooded his vision, and he felt his head pound. He felt sick…and yet, his heart still leapt with joy.

His golden orbs blazed with confusion as he stared at the only woman who could paralyse him like this. Soma stared deeply into the eyes of Nakiri Erina and felt a once familiar sensation: a tightening around his chest. He searched his empty mind for something, _anything_ , to say, but nothing came to him. He was completely speechless.

He saw movement behind her, and watched Hisako emerge into the room next to her, a concerned look etched on her face.

"Erina-sama? What's wrong?" Hisako's attention was firmly fixed on the blonde, so she hadn't seen Soma when she came in. But when she turned her head to look in Erina's direction, she seemed to mimic the other two in widening her eyes and freezing on the spot. However, unlike the other two, her vocal cords appeared to be in perfect working condition.

"Y-Yukihira? What are you doing here?"

Soma glanced at her and gave a shaky smile, and tried his best to reply.

"Yo, Hisako. Did I…come at a bad time?" He chuckled uneasily, and rubbed his head awkwardly, clearly lost for words.

 _This is bad_ , Hisako thought, worry creased on her face. _Erina-sama wasn't supposed to see Yukihira until she was completely ready…_ She glanced at Erina and grimaced inwardly, unable to think of a way to resolve the situation. _Come on, Yukihira! Say something!_

Soma wanted to say something. _Just a simple greeting…Anything'll do! Come on, just say something!_

"I…er…think I should go…" He stammered, voice shaking.

 _Anything but that! Dumbass!_

Erina continued her vacant staring, and Soma wondered if she was even able to hear him, or anything at all. Was she trapped in her own world, just like he was?

Hisako stared at him, equal parts sympathetic and angry at his cowardice, but nodded in support and stepped out of the way of the door, allowing Soma to pass through. Soma gulped thickly and willed his feet to move. He took each step slowly, his legs trembling with each movement.

Erina was staring straight at him as he got closer and closer to her and he felt a pang of guilt over his lack of backbone as he gazed deep into those beautiful purple eyes. His breath hitched as he saw the emotions raging within those dazzling orbs and realised she was likely feeling the same rush of confusion as he was. _Then she won't blame me for doing this, right?_ He chuckled humourlessly to himself, aware of his pathetic actions.

She wasn't moving. Soma realised he would have to walk directly beside her to get out. The thought sent his stomach flipping and his heart pumping furiously. He swallowed his trepidation and steeled himself. As he passed her, he was regretting his actions more and more, suddenly realising how he was quite possibly throwing away the only chance he had to apologise to her. To resolve their fractured relationship. _She's right there, dammit! Say something!_

Soma left the room in silence.

"Erina-sama? Are you alright?"

Erina stared blankly at the space that Soma had been occupying moments ago. She nodded her head numbly as a tear ran slowly down her cheek. She looked back at Hisako, who smiled at her sympathetically.

"I-I apologise, Erina-sama. I should have known that Soma would have come to see me. This is my fault…" Erina could see her lifelong friend on the verge of tears and she felt stupid for being so selfish and making her worry so much.

"No, Hisako. This…was out of your control. I guess I just…wasn't expecting it so soon…"

Hisako walked over to her and placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

"Don't worry yourself too much, Erina-sama. I'm certain Yukihira-kun was just as shocked as you, that's why he left…"

"He…he didn't even say anything to me. He talked to you but…he just said nothing to me…"

"He probably still feels guilty about what happened. Perhaps he just wasn't prepared to see you so soon. I'm sure he wants to talk to you, but he just isn't ready to face his guilt yet."

"I…understand that, I suppose. After all, I feel the exact same way," Erina mumbled, her heart still racing erratically from her unexpected encounter. She breathed deeply and attempted to stop the trembling she felt throughout her body as Hisako helped guide her to her bed.

Erina glanced up at her room, a sight she hadn't seen for such a long time. Her nostalgia hit her in both joyous and morose vibes, as she was left feeling dazed and exhausted.

She remembered how happy she once felt sitting in this room, having defeated her father and found happiness with Soma.

She remembered his annoying smile, and the way he would say things without thinking, and how he would randomly and unexpectedly be affectionate…

She remembered his twisted face of anger and the hateful way he spat those words at her.

Erina felt the same pang in her heart yet again.

She wanted to see him again. She knew what she wanted to say.

Erina gazed at the ajar door, hoping by some kind of miracle he would burst in and say all the words she wanted him to say.

But Erina knew better than that. She sat in silence, aware of Hisako by her side comforting her. She felt awful having dragged her loyal friend and aide into her mess, and how unwaveringly supportive she was being.

 _I should apologise to her._

Erina wanted to express her gratitude to her best friend, but she found herself unable to speak. Her throat closed up and refused to cooperate with her wishes. Erina felt guilty, but she knew Hisako wouldn't even consider feeling betrayed.

Erina sat in silence, contemplating her next move.

* * *

Soma was running.

He didn't know why he was, but he was sprinting as if his life depended on fleeing the Nakiri estate as quickly as possible.

He had no control over his body; his mind screamed at him to turn around, and confront Erina with the respect she deserves. But he was such a coward, he couldn't even find it in himself to say the words he wished to say for so long.

Before he knew it, Soma had arrived back at the Polar Star dorm. He didn't know what he thought he could accomplish by coming here, but he didn't have much else choice in where to go.

He entered as nonchalantly as he could, greeting the other with his usual goofy grin, but he couldn't stop trembling as he walked to his room.

Just as he was about to enter and devise a plan, he heard the door behind him open. He turned and saw Takumi exiting Megumi's room. Under normal circumstances, Soma would just greet his friend normally and leave him be. However, these clearly weren't normal circumstances.

"Takumi!" Soma cried, a little more loud and desperate than he wanted to appear.

Takumi jumped slightly in surprise, and quickly turned to address his agitated friend.

"Y-Yukihira? What's up, man?"

Soma didn't respond, and instead grabbed Takumi and yanked him into his room with no warning, slamming the door shut behind them.

"What's going on, Yukihira? You're acting really weir-"

"She's back." Whatever Takumi had tried to say instantly dissipated, and he instead frowned in confusion at Soma's interruption.

"She's…back? What do you-" Takumi's eyes widened as he realised. He knew the shock he was feeling was nothing compared to what Soma was going through right now.

"Did…Did you talk to her?" Takumi stuttered, unsure of the right approach to take in this situation. Soma was unpredictable when it came to Erina, and this sudden declaration didn't give him enough time to consider what would be best for Soma to hear. However, Takumi was currently focused on getting the truth, first and foremost.

"I- That's the thing…" Soma seemed ashamed of something, but Takumi knew better than to interrupt unnecessarily. He just let Soma talk.

"I was to the Nakiri mansion to see Hisako, and then, BAM! She's just…there. I just, I wasn't expecting it, you know? It caught me off guard, I wasn't ready. So…I just left. Without saying anything."

Takumi raised his eyebrows in shock. He would've found it amusing that the usual cocksure and unwavering Soma would be so affected by a girl, but he knew this was no laughing matter. He had to look out for his friend.

"Did she say anything then?"

"Nope. We just stood there in complete awkward silence…God! I'm such an idiot! I should've said something…"

"I'm sure it's fine, man-" Takumi tried to console his friend, but it was clear it would take more effort for Soma to calm down.

"It's not fine! How many times have I sat here complaining about all the things I wanted to say to her? Well, she was right there, and I said NOTHING! That could've been my one chance…"

Takumi stayed silent.

"I didn't even apologise to her…" Soma was on the verge of tears now. Takumi wasn't used to this. Usually, Soma would be riled up and furious at this stage, but now, he was completely different. He just seemed…tired. All the passion, positive or negative, had been drained from Soma's face, and his expression conveyed the look of a man who had given up. He was nothing like the Soma he used to know, always flashing his dumb grin and being unbelievably optimistic. This Soma kept his head down, eyes gazing at the floor, brimming with tears and mumbling as he spoke. Takumi knew he'd have to say something pretty damn impressive to lift his friend's spirits.

"That might've not have been your only chance, you know."

Soma looked up dejectedly as if barely registering the words that Takumi spoke.

"Huh?"

"Who says that's the last time you'll see her again?"

"But… I mean she-"

"You don't know, man. You don't know why she came back, first of all."

"That…that's true," Soma muttered, finally beginning to consider a bright side to this situation. Takumi pressed on, desperate to help his friend.

"Hell, maybe she's re-enrolling back in Totsuki. Then you'll have plenty of chances to talk to her!"

"But that'll make it awkward, won't it?"

"Trust me, the longer you leave it, the more awkward it'll get. Even if it's just an apology, you can do that, easy."

Soma gazed down in consideration, deep in thought. Takumi knew it would be tough for Soma to say anything to Erina, especially after the encounter they just experienced, but he also knew it was vital for those two to get back on friendly terms. The longer they wait, the more they have to apologise for, and the harder it will be to actually initiate a conversation.

"I know it's not an easy choice… but you've gotta try, man. You know deep down, behind all this awkwardness and animosity, you still love her."

Soma chuckled drily. "Well, yeah. That's pretty obvious."

"So what have you got to lose? As long as you tell her how you really feel, she'll understand."

Soma turned that thought over in his mind for a few moments, but Takumi should see the inner conflict occurring within him. To an outsider like him, the choice seemed obvious. But Soma wasn't the typical guy, and so his emotions and mindset were quite askew as well, meaning it was a tough choice for him to make.

Eventually, Soma met Takumi's gaze and gave a wry chuckle.

"What the hell. Why not?" He chuckled again, more sincerely, and looked at Takumi with renewed confidence.

"You're serious?" Takumi asked incredulously, a grin already stretching across his face.

"Sure! Like you said, what have I got to lose? Might as well try. At least then, I'll be satisfied." He said simply, not appearing overly enthused about his choice, but not expressing any disdain either.

Takumi felt elated seeing Soma positive and full of hope, as if he was the Soma everyone once knew. He hoped that he was doing the right thing for his friend and that things could return to normal eventually.

Soma stood up and stretched out his body, sighing loudly.

"Welp, here goes nothing." Soma grinned, and walked out of the room, back towards his destiny. Takumi gave a light-hearted salute to Soma as he attempted to walk confidently out of the dorm, and watched as he disappeared from sight.

* * *

 _This is such a dumb idea!_

 _She won't want to see you again! Why do you think she said nothing?_

 _You're wasting your time, she'll reject you again!_

Soma's thought ran rampant, trying to convince him to turn around and forget this whole stupid plan. However, whether through pride, sheer force of will or a genuine desire to resolve things, Soma pressed on.

He was so absorbed in his thoughts, he didn't hear the voice calling out to him from afar. Not until she marched up behind him and grabbed him by the scruff of his collar. Soma jumped and tore himself away from the grip to see Alice standing behind him, looking unimpressed.

"Oi, Yukihira! Did you seriously not hear me calling you? You looked like you were in a world of your own."

"S-Sorry, Alice," Soma chuckled, trying to hide any detail that may alert her to his intention. "What did you want me for?"

"Grandfather wants you for something. He didn't specify what it was exactly, but it seemed kinda urgent."

Soma inwardly cursed. _Of all the times to be called over!_ He needed to make an excuse.

"Couldn't it…wait for a few minutes? I've just gotta..run some errands…"

"I don't think it's wise keeping him waiting, Yukihira. You can just do it later, right?"

Soma didn't know what to say. _Surely Alice knows that Erina is back? So it should be alright to tell her…_ He didn't want to risk anything, one wrong word and his entire plan crumbles. He knew there was no way to avoid it, so he begrudgingly accepted his fate.

"Alright, let's go…"

* * *

Soma wasn't fazed about meeting the Headmaster. Hell, he was practically best buddies with him after his help in defeating Azami and Central. He knew the revered Senzaemon harboured no ill will toward Soma, so he knew he wasn't in trouble at least. But he remained clueless as to why he had been called over so suddenly.

Alice rapped her knuckles on the door to the Headmaster's office and waited for a response.

"Come in, Alice."

Alice pushed the door opened and allowed Soma to enter before following him in. Soma took his time admiring the office around him. The decorations were humble but not boring, and one corner of the room was devoted entirely to gym equipment. Soma chuckled to himself and wondered if he could ask whether or not the Demon King of Food to let him into his workout routine. Picture frames adorned many of the shelves surrounding the room, mostly of the Headmaster's friends and family. Soma noticed one of his father and beamed. Then he saw one of Erina, and immediately realised that he shouldn't be standing around gawking at the room. He had to get this meeting over and done with as soon as possible.

Nakiri Senzaemon stood behind his desk, facing out the window to the expansive mountain range lining the academy. He seemed to be lost in thought, but Soma knew the old man was as alert as ever.

"I brought him, Grandfather," Alice said, puncturing the silent air.

"Thank you, Alice. I appreciate your help." Senzaemon replied, still gazing out the window.

"If that's all, I'll be leaving-" Alice started to turn around and exit the room when Senzaemon turned around to face the two.

"Actually, Alice, I would prefer it if you stayed here as well."

Alice seemed perplexed that this news suddenly involved her as well, but she had no desire to contest her grandfather's wishes, so she obliged and took a seat next to Soma.

The Headmaster gazed at the both of them, his piercing red eyes evoking no obvious hints as to why he was leaving them in suspense like this.

"Hey, Pops," Soma exclaimed, becoming exasperated at the unnecessarily long time it was taking Senzaemon to reveal what he brought them for. "If you don't mind, could you make it quick? I got somewhere I need to be."

"Oh, I'm sure you do, Yukihira Soma." The inquisitive tone in his voice unnerved Soma slightly and he edged back in his seat, unsure what else to say.

Senzaemon's gaze softened and he turned to Alice, clearly trying to find the right words to phrase what he was about to say.

"Erina…she's back, Alice."

Soma witnessed Alice's face drop and she instantly bolted up from her seat to try and find her cousin. However, she was quickly stopped in her tracks by the bellowing voice of her grandfather.

"Wait, Alice! Let me talk for just a little while longer, and then you can go see her."

Alice looked back at the muscular man and sighed in defeat, retaking her seat next to Soma, now clearly as anxious for Senzaemon to finish talking as Soma was.

He stared at the two of them for a few more seconds before continuing.

"As you know, Erina left this academy roughly four months ago. I understand it came as a shock to all of you, especially the two of you, considering how close you were to her."

Soma and Alice exchanged glances, both seemingly growing more irritated at hearing a story they've already been acquainted with many times.

"I believe the reason she gave to you was to explore the rest of Japan and refine her culinary expertise. But you're both sharp enough to realise that was a lie. The well-travelled culinary genius Nakiri Erina needing to broaden her horizons? Hah, she's a terrible liar."

Soma realised the meaning behind this meeting. He was fairly certain Erina didn't mention the unpleasant argument she and Soma had had the day before her announcement to her grandfather, so Senzaemon wanted to explain Erina's true reasoning for her disappearance. Of course, Soma knew everything already, but he didn't interrupt. It was only fair Alice got to hear the truth as well.

"The truth is, she was scarred horribly from that battle with her father."

Alice sat up in her chair, clearly confused.

"What do you mean, Grandfather? When we won, I've never seen Erina so happy before! It seemed like she had finally broken free of Uncle Azami's grip on her. How…was she still scarred?"

"It's true that Erina made remarkable progress in recovering from the brainwashing her father subjected her to, but those kinds of wounds don't heal overnight, Alice."

Alice squirmed in her chair slightly, clearly uncomfortable imagining Erina in such distress. Soma remained quiet, since he had nothing to say in this situation.

"She was hurt, and those who are hurt immensely don't always think logically. Erina's mindset became askew and twisted, and she led herself to believe that being around things that reminded of the past, where she was tormented, were unhealthy for her. And so, she separated herself from her friends, her family, and even the academy itself. She was adamant about getting away from those traumatic events. And yet…"

Soma looked over at Alice, who had an expression of guilt and regret plastered on her face. Soma knew that look all too well. She was thinking about how she could have helped Erina more, thinking back to the situations where she didn't say something that she should have. Soma sympathised with the white-haired vixen, as he had been in that position too.

"Erina remained tortured by her past. She was incorrect in assuming the pain would go away just by running, and so she found herself trapped with no one to comfort her, no one around except the thoughts that plagued her mind. She considered coming back. Time and time again, she wanted to board a plane, come back to Totsuki and live happily with her friends. But you know Erina. Too stubborn for her own good."

"Despite mine and Hisako's best attempts, we couldn't convince her that those of you she considered her friend didn't despise you for what she had done."

Soma felt a familiar stab of guilt, but did his best to suppress it. Meanwhile, Alice was becoming even more hysterical.

"But, Grandfather! Why… why on earth would we despise her for it?" Tears were already flowing down Alice's cheeks, but Soma couldn't tell whether they were tears of sadness at hearing her cousin's plight or tears of joy in realising she could see Erina again.

"That was just how Erina felt. Obviously, it was wrong of her to keep this mindset, but Erina refused to accept any other reality."

Alice didn't have any rebuttal. She sat in silence, deep in thought.

"Yukihira Soma."

Soma met the fiery gaze of the Headmaster.

"I'm aware that you've already seen Erina today."

Alice's head snapped up in surprise, and she stared at Soma in bewilderment.

"You have? Wait, so that means…"

"Yeah," Soma interrupted, becoming increasingly more frustrated that he was being stopped from seeing Erina, especially after hearing everything he just did. "That was the 'errand' I had to do."

"Well, you've gotta go! Right now!" Alice exclaimed, jumping out of her seat and pulling Soma with her.

"Wait!" Senzaemon interjected as Alice was about to swing open the door.

"Grandfather, surely you understand that-"

"Yes, I'm aware. I just wanted to caution you." His gaze was fixed solely on Soma.

"What's that then?" Soma replied, trying to slowly inch towards the door.

"Erina's mind is still fragile. She will be pleased to all of you again, I'm sure, but it may take her some time to readjust herself back to how things were. I would just advise you to be careful around her."

"Of course, Pops," Soma grinned.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Go!" Senzaemon flashed an encouraging smile.

Soma didn't need to be told twice. He turned and ran out the door, sprinting as fast as he possibly could. He felt slightly bad leaving Alice behind in his wake, but he would apologise later. Right now, he had someone else to apologise to.

* * *

He made it to the Nakiri mansion in record time, and didn't stop running until he made it to Erina's room. He composed himself, knocked on the door and waited for a response.

"Come in."

Soma gulped in trepidation, and slowly opened the door. There, he was met by the gaze of Hisako.

"H-Hisako? Where…where's Erina?"

Hisako's eyes widened and a look of panic struck her face.

"Yukihira? She…she went to go see you…"

Soma inwardly cursed. They must have just missed each other on the way.

"So she's at the Polar Star Dorm?"

"Y-Yeah, she-"

Soma didn't wait for the rest of Hisako's response. He ran out of the room and the Nakiri mansion, and sprinted towards the Polar Star. He was struck with a sensation of déjà vu as he ran, having done this exact action earlier today. However, this time, it was for a different purpose. Soma ignored the burning in his legs and lungs and pressed on relentlessly, not slowing down until the familiar sight of the Polar Star loomed into view.

He doubled over and caught his breath for a few seconds, before quickly walking into the dorm.

As he entered, he desperately looked around, hoping to catch some sight of her, but to no avail.

"Ah, Yukihira Soma! Good timing!"

Soma whipped his head around to see the warden of the Polar Star, Fumio Daimido, greeting him.

"Fumio-san! Sorry, I'm in a bit of hurry-"

"Oh, I know, Yukihira. You've kept your visitor waiting for far too long!"

Soma's eyes widened in response.

"Go get 'er!" Fumio gave him a thumbs up in encouragement. Soma grinned and made for his room. Of course, Fumio never specified _where_ she'd be, but Soma had a pretty good guess.

He arrived at his room. The door was shut. _That clinches it_ , Soma thought. He left his door open this morning and hadn't returned yet. Fumio never cleaned his room and the other members of the Polar Star Dorm never really wanted to interfere with Soma's room. Meaning there was only one reason…

Soma looked at the door handle, and gulped in apprehension. He rapped his knuckles against the wooden door and waited for a response.

"C-Come in," a soft voice called out. Soma instantly recognised it and sighed contentedly. It had been too long since he last heard that voice.

He opened the door and walked in. As he expected, Nakiri Erina was inside, sitting on his bed. She met his eyes and tried to keep a neutral look, but Soma could see the trepidation in her eyes. _Those beautiful amethyst eyes._

Soma shut the door behind him. It was just the two of them.

They gazed into each other's eyes longingly, clearly wanting to say so much. However, they both had something simple to say to each other before anything else.

"I'm sorry," they said in unison.

 **And that's it for now! I know, I'm the absolute worst at cliffhangers, but I just wanted to get this story out as soon as possible. Thank you to everyone who has been so patient in waiting for the chapter, I always told myself I'd never take a horrendously long hiatus from this story, but I guess I went against my own wishes! Hopefully, this chapter was good enough to satisfy the unbelievably long amount of time you guys had to wait, and I can promise a 9-month gap in between chapters will never happen again.**

 **Feel free to review with any recommendations or critiques you may have.**

 **Thanks for reading this story, talk to you guys later!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey, everyone! No, you're not hallucinating, I've actually finished this next chapter. It's been a damn long time since I even thought of this story with all the life stuff I've had going on these past few years. I'm off to university soon and it feels like I've grown up a lot since I first decided to start writing fanfic (even if it was, like, 5 chapters). With this next chapter of my life beginning (pun intended), I wanted to finally appease you poor souls who have had to sit on my awful cliffhangers for literal years. For all of you who left any type of review, favourite or follow, this chapter is because of you. You all managed to motivate me enough to get this chapter done and dusted for good. In all seriousness, thank you all for all the support and all the encouragement you've given me. This is by no means the end of the story, especially due to this new lease of life I've been given, but I'd like to think this is the culmination of all of the story so far, so I hope it's worth the wait.**

 **Also, there is kind of an M-rated scene (hint hint), but I think it pushes on the boundary of the fic being rated M. Let me know if you guys think I should leave out scenes like the one you're about to see or if I should just go all out and change it to an M-rated story.**

 **As always, feel free to suggest any ideas or criticisms you may have with the story. Any review is greatly appreciated.**

 **On with the story…**

* * *

"I'm sorry," they said in unison.

Soma could already feel tears welling up in his eyes, but he steeled himself and force the tears back down. _There's a time and place to be bawling like a baby,_ Soma thought. _And this is neither!_

Erina seemed to have prepared herself much better than Soma, since she had a firm, determined look on her face and seemed eager to say whatever was on her mind.

"Soma-kun, I-" She had started to speak, but almost immediately, Soma interjected.

"Why…why are you apologising?" Soma asked, the fierce emotions within him threatening to boil over at the slightest exertion. His voice cracked slightly and he took a breath to compose himself before returning Erina's gaze.

"I mean… what are you apologising for? You… you didn't do anything wrong…"

"What are you talking about?" Erina asked incredulously, rising from the bed to stand inches away from Soma's face. Soma had to fight the urge to reach out and hold her, he willed himself to remain in control of the situation.

Erina continued, her confidence in her speech refusing to betray any doubt or hesitation she may have been feeling.

"I was completely in the wrong! Thinking that abandoning you would solve any of my problems… I was so foolish!"

Soma could feel the ghost of a smile forming on his lips, despite his own disbelief that he was truly in this moment, right now. Surely it was a dream? But Soma knew this wasn't the case. His dreams were far from this pleasant.

"But I shouldn't have reacted the way I did, Erina. I know that now. I can't even imagine how much I put you through 'cause I was too stubborn to see that you were hurting."

Erina smiled faintly, clearly gratified by Soma's words.

"It looks like we were both pretty stupid, huh?" He chuckled as the first of the tears began to break free and trickled down his cheek. Erina chuckled in response, similar tears of relief flowing down her face.

There was a moment of silence, but it was a beautiful silence. Everything that needed to be said was out in the open and the atmosphere was content and serene. Soma slowly began to wrap his arms around Erina's waist, waiting for a signal for him to stop. When he caught her gaze and found no such signal, Soma committed to the action, and gratefully embraced Erina for the first time in an agonisingly long time.

"I missed you, Erina."

"I missed you too, Soma-kun."

It was perfect.

Soma didn't care about all the drama before this hug, or whatever would happen after. Right now, in this very moment, finally reconciling with the only person who could make him feel this way, he was happy. Truly happy.

Neither of them knew how much time had passed and neither of them cared. For months, they yearned for the warmth of the other, and now their wishes were fulfilled. The pain and hardship of the last few months, they reckoned, didn't matter in this moment. All that mattered was the pure and simple truth that they were together again, and there was nothing better than that.

One thing was nagging at the back of Soma's mind. He couldn't help it. Hugs were great and all, but he knew he couldn't resist going a little further.

With his arms still wrapped around her waist, Soma slowly worked up his head upwards, until his lips met the exposed skin of Erina's neck. He could hear her gasp at the sudden contact, and that was all the motivation he needed to continue. He started delicately at first, cherishing how warm her skin was and how comforting it felt to have her run her hands through his hair.

It was obvious though that they both wanted _more._

Eagerly, Soma brought his face up until his nose was pressed against Erina's. They stared longingly into the other's eyes, their passion and desire barely concealed. Soma didn't feel like reigniting their usual staring contest, however. He leaned forward and almost chuckled with delight as he felt Erina's lips against his own. He had almost forgotten how intoxicating the feeling was, and now that the feeling was fresh in his mind, he had no intentions of stopping. He began to step forward, his lips still locked with hers and eyes closed in ecstasy. Erina helped guide him and eventually, Soma felt the two of them falling onto the bed.

Soma crouched on all fours above Erina, who was gripping fiercely onto his forearms, biting her lip in anticipation. Despite his best efforts, Soma knew he couldn't resist for a second longer, even to tease the blonde for her worked up state. He realised that he probably looked just the same as her, desperate and hungry for more.

Their lips met once more, and even before their kiss, Soma felt Erina's fingertips slide from his arms to the underside of his shirt. Unwilling to disappoint her, he broke the kiss momentarily so she could remove his shirt with it snagging only twice before floating across the room and landing in a heap on the desk Soma regularly used for his utensils and such. He noted, before Erina gripped the sides of his neck gently and brought him back to her level, that his shirt landed perfectly in the centre of his wok. _Bullseye_ , he chuckled to himself.

Soma felt Erina drifting her grip on him from his neck, her fingers drifting down his bare back, eagerly feeling as much as she could. It was only then Soma remembered how little experience they both had with this. It seemed so stupid to look back and think about how neither of them made the first move to initiate this kind of lovemaking. So stupid in fact, that Soma boxed it up and immediately put it out of mind. Now was the time to quell that point for good.

Without the slightest hint of hesitation, Soma began unbuttoning the few buttons on the top of Erina's blouse. In response, Erina arched her back to give him a better angle to finish the job, all the while, their lips remained locked in a fierce battle for dominance. Soma began to lift Erina's top, but she suddenly grabbed his arms and Soma feared for a second that he had overstepped a boundary. His fears were allayed almost immediately, however, as Erina used her grip to flip herself on top, while Soma landed on the bed. He watched as Erina removed her top in one smooth action and flung it across the room, coincidently landing in the exact same wok as Soma's top had done. He marvelled at her aim for a second before her sly smile brought him back to the right mindset.

Erina lay directly on top of Soma as they continued their heated kiss, and she was surprised to feel how fast Soma's heart was beating against her chest. She took pride in knowing she had made the usually calm and collected Soma so flustered. Her mind wandered instantly to the scene at the Elite Ten table with Soma's quiet fury and the intense argument they had in this very room. As she forced her mind back into reality, she made a point to affirm that this was the only way she wanted to drive Soma crazy.

Soma's hands were busy, hungrily feeling up as much of her as they could, though Erina noted that they were gradually drifting further down her body. She suddenly felt a sharp pang of trepidation. Were they going to do…that? Was she really ready for it? Weren't they rushing things a little bit?

Whatever doubts Erina had were immediately quashed when the near silence of the room was pierced by the sound of her phone's ringtone. Soma released her from his grip with a smirk plastered on his face, seemingly more amused than annoyed that they had been interrupted. Erina moved off of the bed and saw her Grandfather was the one calling her. She took a breath to release the adrenaline built up from her steamy encounter with Soma and answered.

"Hello, Grandfather?"

"Ah, Erina. I hope I'm not interrupting anything?"

Erina immediately blushed in embarrassment, but kept her voice nonchalant and calm.

"Not at all. I was just speaking with Soma and-"

"Oh, I see," he chuckled, "So I most certainly was interrupting in some way," he added mischievously.

Erina laughed and rolled her eyes, even though her Grandfather obviously couldn't see the latter. Unbeknownst to Erina, however, Soma walked up directly behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist and teasingly nibbled on her earlobe. She stifled a gasp and turned her head slightly to see Soma wearing a devilish grin. _So he wants to play this game?_ Erina giggled inwardly. _I suppose I can play along…_

Without response, she pushed her body against Soma's, feeling a slight resistance lower down. Erina grinned wickedly as Soma flinched, the sudden sensation taking him by surprise. He met her gaze and returned with a smug smile, one that seemed to say " _Game on."_

"So is everything sorted out the two of you? Are you on better terms now?" the voice of her Grandfather reached her ear and Erina barely heard it. In the few seconds of silence, the both had already stripped down further and were both standing in just their underwear. Erina knew she wasn't ready for anything major, but she was more than comfortable with a little fun. She remembered she was supposed to reply to her Grandfather, and responded even as she begin to grind on Soma's bulge.

"Yes, thank you, Grandfather. We've sorted out our differences now."

"That's wonderful to hear, Erina! I'm glad you two have reconciled. How are you feeling besides that?"

Erina felt wonderful. She was sure Soma's hands had touched every inch of her body and he was starting to become teasingly rough with his kisses along her neck. She had to fight the urge to gasp or moan, and did her best to keep her breathing under control.

"Much better, Grandfather. It's amazing being back at Totsuki and seeing all my old friends."

There was a burning desire within Erina, to just throw the phone away and lose herself fully in Soma's embrace. But she knew she had somewhat of a reputation to upkeep and couldn't live with the embarrassment of her Grandfather finding out what she was doing whilst she was talking to him over the phone.

"That's fantastic, Erina. I'm glad you finally came to your senses." He laughed heartily, clearly in a cheerful mood. "If I haven't caught you at a bad time, could you come to my office? I'd like to discuss some things with you in person."

Erina cursed inwardly. She wasn't eager to stop her game with Soma, mainly because it might mean she would lose, but also because the pleasure she was deriving from the situation was unlike any other experience she'd ever had. But she knew better than to give into her desires, and reluctantly replied.

"Of course, Grandfather. I'll be there shortly."

She ended the call and immediately turned around and initiated a passionate kiss with an equally triumphant and disappointed Soma. Once the kiss was over, he chuckled.

"I can't believe we just did that! That was so naughty, Erina…" he said playfully.

"You're clearly a bad influence on me," Erina retorted, unwilling to break her gaze with the redhead.

"Well, I'm sorry, but there's no way you're getting rid of me," he laughed, his thumb gently caressing her cheek.

It took almost every ounce of willpower she possessed, but Erina turned away from Soma and stepped into her skirt, then walked over to fetch her top, adding extra swagger to her hips knowing Soma would be watching.

"Hey, look at that! Both of our tops landed in the wok!" She giggled, grabbing her blouse and putting it back on. She turned to watch Soma jumping into his trousers and suddenly felt an almost unexplainable sensation of guilt.

"H-Hey, Soma-kun?" She asked timidly.

Soma looked up once both legs were through the holes and his belt was firmly secured. "What's up, Erina?"

"We…you don't think we're rushing things, right?"

Soma gave a look of confusion, but seemed to ponder the question for a few seconds before answering.

"I can say personally I don't regret what we did. Hell, I've pretty much been dreaming about doing that with you for months!"

Erina laughed, shaking her head at his response.

"But seriously…" Erina looked up as Soma held an uncharacteristically serious expression.

"If you think we're going too fast, just say, alright? Let's say what we just did now is the maximum for now."

Erina nodded. "That's a good idea. I don't think I'm ready to… go all the way, but I've been comfortable with today."

Suddenly, Soma chuckled and shook his head in disbelief.

"What? What's so funny?" Erina queried.

"Nah, it's just… it's kinda funny, y'know? We've only seen each other for like 15 minutes after so long and we're acting like nothing ever changed. Talking about how far we're gonna go, acting like what we just did wasn't a big deal," Soma had a wide smile on his face, and he shrugged his shoulders.

"Ah well, not like it matters now, right?" He added.

"What do you mean?"

Soma's smile slightly dropped. "I-I mean, we are, like, back together right? Like, proper official boyfriend-slash-girlfriend type of deal?"

Erina grinned. "Of course we're back together, you big dope. What else did you expect?"

Those words were all Soma needed to hear. His smile was the widest it had been that day.

* * *

"No way." Takumi uttered.

Soma took immense joy at seeing his friend's dumbfounded expression at his revelation, so much so that he simply leant back in his chair and replied with an innocent smile.

"You're being serious? One hundred percent?"

"When would I ever lie to you, Takumi?" Soma grinned, barely able to hide his excitement.

"It's just a lot to take in, you know? And no one else knows?"

"Well, it's a pretty exclusive club. You, me, Hisako and Alice know she's back, and that's it."

"And you chose to tell me about it?"

Soma's grin grew even wider. "Of course I'd tell you. You're the one I've been torturing with my angst over my long lost girlfriend, it's only fair you're the first to hear the happy story."

Takumi finally reciprocated the infectious grin Soma was giving him and was silently grateful to see his friend in such high spirits.

"So when will everyone else find out then? This'll be the kind of thing that everyone will be talking about soon, I assume Erina will announce it on her own terms?"

"I have no clue, maybe her Gramps will announce or something? She hasn't said anything about it to me."

"Of course, you didn't do much talking in the end, did you?" Takumi teased, accentuating his joke with an exaggerated wink and sly smile. Soma burst out laughing, covering his face with a hand in feigned embarrassment.

"I told you that in confidence," he chuckled.

"It's not something I'm gonna let you forget," Takumi replied flippantly. "In this very room, within 15 minutes of seeing Erina for the first time in months, you were both already in your underwear. You must be a real charmer, you know? I mean, I can't recall you even mentioning if you'd gotten to second base with her! And here you are, Mr Casanova, already well on his way to home base…"

"I swear to God, I will kill you if you say another word," Soma replied light-heartedly.

"This is great news, though. Everyone will be so glad to see Erina again."

"For sure, man. This'll definitely lift everyone's spirits for this year."

"Hey, don't forget your paperwork! You've got a hell of a lot of catching up to do with your First Seat work, you can't afford to spend all your time in the embrace of sweet Erina…"

"What did I just say?" Soma rolled his eyes, but couldn't stop the grin flashing on his face. It felt good to be teased about Erina. Strangely enough, he had missed it.

"Sorry, sorry. I promise not to tease you about Erina for at least the next fifteen seconds."

"I'll take that," Soma chuckled. "But yeah, I know, I'll focus on the paperwork stuff. God, we're only like a month in our second year and we've got stacks of paper up to our eyeballs! You'd think they'd give us a break, right?"

"No such luck, buddy. We're the Elite Ten, we don't do breaks." Takumi stood, and walked over to the door. "Well, I've kept Megumi waiting long enough. I promise to keep my lips sealed about you-know-what."

Soma followed him to the door and patted him on the back.

"I appreciate all you've done for me, Takumi. You're my best friend, you know that?"

Takumi beamed and stepped forward, wrapping Soma in the tightest of bro hugs.

"You're my best friend too, Soma. I'm glad we managed to work through all that shit."

"It was a real journey, but I think we've ended up pretty good."

"I'll see you soon then, buddy."

"Until next time," Soma gave a salute as Takumi walked out his room.

Shutting the door behind him, Soma flopped onto his bed and put his arms behind his head, feeling completely relaxed and upbeat. He knew it would another long day tomorrow, but the incentive of seeing Erina was enough to make him giddy with excitement. He gazed at his phone, noting it was still quite an early night, at least for him. _I've got nothing else to do,_ Soma thought, _I might as well try out some new dishes._

He stood and approached his desk, littered with his many cooking apparatuses. His gaze lingered on the wok at the centre of the table and gave an instinctual grin. He grabbed the handle of the wok and carried it over to his portable stovetop, and fetched the first few ingredients he set his eyes on. He noticed the carton of eggs placed out in front of him, and a lightbulb shone above his head. Now that Erina was back, he knew what he needed to do now.

 _Make her say it's delicious._

* * *

A knock on the door startled Soma as he was on his 57th attempt at creating the perfect dish.

"Come in," he called out, rubbing his eyes in fatigue.

The door opened and Megumi walked in, almost immediately massaging her temples in muted annoyance when she saw Soma's disheveled state.

"Soma-kun, did you seriously just pull another all-nighter?"

Soma arched an eyebrow in confusion and looked to the window to see the beginnings of sunlight peeking beyond the horizon. He chuckled weakly and forced himself up, his back aching from his constant hunched over position throughout the night.

"Damn, I really let time slip away again, huh? I didn't even notice time passing."

"You never change, do you Soma-kun?" Megumi smiled, glad she bothered to check whether her friend had actually heard the news. "Anyway, didn't you hear? The Headmaster has called an assembly for all the students in 15 minutes!"

Soma's eyes widened and he immediately fell upon his wardrobe, scanning for anything somewhat clean and presentable. "This is the first I'm hearing of it, when was all of that planned?" Soma panted in between bursts of him stripping and jumping into new clothes.

Megumi, having gotten used to Soma spontaneously changing in front of her, calmly turned on the spot facing away from him and checked her phone to confirm the information she had been given.

"It was only yesterday, quite late, I think, but pretty everyone has heard it. It must be something urgent for the Headmaster to arrange it so suddenly. What do you think it could be?"

Soma slipped his arms through the sleeve holes and grabbed his bag, and motioned for Megumi to continue their conversation as they walked.

"I dunno. Like you said, it must be something important if everyone's being gathered on such short notice? Maybe a new teacher or something?"

Megumi glanced at her watch and didn't reply, instead picking up the pace towards the gathering. Soma followed in suit, his mind racing with possible scenarios.

As they approached the large crowd, Soma noticed Hisako walking towards the pair.

"Hey, Hisako! Do you know why everyone's been called here?" He asked, scanning the crowd for Erina in the hopes he might get to see her before the announcement.

"I'd hate to ruin the surprise," Hisako giggled. "But don't worry, you won't be watching from the crowd, Senzaemon-dono has requested you watch on the sidelines of the stage."

Soma cocked his head in bemusement. "What, just me specifically? Why's that?"

Hisako giggled again. "Again, I don't want to ruin the surprise. Just follow me."

Soma bade goodbye to Megumi, who he saw meet up with Takumi and the other Polar Star members. As he followed Hisako towards the backstage area, he picked up on several conversation, each theorising on the nature of the gathering. Some believed it was an update in regards to the training camp, though it was strange that students besides the first years were ordered to come. Others posited that Senzaemon was stepping down as Headmaster and relinquishing the role to a younger face. Soma didn't pay much attention to those ideas. He knew there was a reason he was requested to be so close to the announcement and Hisako's behaviour seemed to implicate him in something. But what could it be?

Hisako left Soma waiting in the backstage area by himself, waiting for the big reveal. He peeked his head round, trying one last time to spot Erina before giving up and slumping back down in his seat. Of course Erina wouldn't be in the crowd; she wasn't even officially back in Totsuki yet. Soma shrugged his shoulders and leant back in his seat. _I suppose I can ask Hisako after this where I can find Erina…_

Soma heard the chatter amongst the crowd fade out and he turned to see Senzaemon striding up to the lectern. Soma stared intensely at the Headmaster, trying to get a read of the nature of his speech from his face. Obviously, the grey-haired devil betrayed no discernible emotions or thoughts. Soma sighed and began to zone out of his words, assuming whatever he was saying wasn't anything he couldn't just ask the guy later if it was really that important.

"I appreciate all of you coming out…..might be wondering what this gathering is…..I'd like to ask you to remain calm and quiet before….."

Soma's interest was beginning to dwindle until he heard a sentence that immediately snapped him out of his daydreams.

"Please welcome Nakiri Erina to the stage."

Soma leapt to his feet and brought his attention to the stage. Lo and behold, there she was: Nakiri Erina walking towards her grandfather, her body language and facial expression exuding utter confidence as the people in the crowd immediately began vocalising their shock and disbelief. Soma couldn't help but grin at how bold Erina was being, reintroducing herself to Totsuki as soon as the opportunity allowed.

Once Erina approached the lectern, the rantings of the crowd began to die out, everyone present clearly eager to see what the former queen of Totsuki had to say.

"Hello, everyone. I would like to say how pleased I am to be back at Totsuki with all of you again." Erina began, her voice eliciting an aura of command that made it seem like she had never left Totsuki in the first place. She sounded like she belonged, and that made Soma smile contently.

"As you know, I decided to take my studies abroad and expand my culinary knowledge. Whilst this sabbatical was not intended to be so long, I have decided to continue my education here at Totsuki."

There was a round of applause, even some cheering, once Erina had said this, with Soma being one of the applauders. Erina turned her head slightly and made eye contact with Soma. He grinned cheerfully towards her and she responded with a smile of her own, though Soma noted there was a hint of mischief directed towards him. _What is she planning?_ Soma pondered, trying to discern the nature of her smile. There was clearly no ill will within it… It reminded him of the smile she gave him when she was on the phone with her Grandfather, when he initiated a playful game with her. It was a smile that seemed to convey a friendly competition…

Erina turned to address the crowd once more. "But that's not the only reason why I am delivering this announcement. Yukihira Soma, would you mind coming out here?"

Soma was taken aback for a second, but his curiosity immediately overrode all other thoughts, and before he realised it, he was already on the stage, a few feet away from Erina.

"As you all know, once I left Totsuki, Yukihira Soma became the First Seat in my stead. Well, now that I'm back, I think I'd like to reclaim my title."

Soma blinked in confusion, before a smirk overtook his face.

"Yukihira Soma, I challenge you to a Shokugeki for the First Seat."

* * *

 **And there it is! The chapter that rose from the dead! I sincerely hope this update is a sufficient apology for my inability to write at a consistent pace. It felt amazing to write and finish this chapter, so I'm hoping I can release some more updates in a more reasonable timespan (famous last words, I know).**

 **Also, let me know what you thought of the kinda M-rated scene! I'd love to write more of that kind of stuff in this story if that's why you guys are interested in!**

 **Once again, I want to thank all of you who left reviews and such, politely pestering me to continue this series. Without the response from you guys, I think this story would have remained in hiatus limbo forever, so this chapter is thanks to your dedicated persistence in wanting to see more!**

 **Thanks again for reading this story, I'll talk to you guys later!**


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